Doubt and Trust
by Howlingwolf94
Summary: Allen Walker struggles with understanding his feelings for Lenalee and the growing strength of the 14th. Everyone around is distant, causing his doubt to grow and his trust diminish the more closer he is in becoming the 14th. AllenxLenalee
1. Pouring Rain

_Authors Note: I don't D gray-man_

Ch. 1:Pouring Rain

Eight words continued to repeat themselves inside a certain white-haired exorcist's head. _'...you'll end up killing the one you love...'_ Those words frightened him the most because he knew who they were directed to. Lenalee. In the past months, his feelings for said exorcist began to grow and blossom. Nothing made him more happier than to see her smile. But, at the same time, it was increasingly getting harder for him to except his feelings for her. Thoughts of what could or would happen if he gave into his feelings, they grew closer and he changed into the 14th tormented him every night. He would rather die than allow her to suffer because of him and what he would become.

Allen Walker laid wide awake in his bed, staring up at the ceiling and listening to the sound of raindrops pound against the only window in his room. He took a quick glance to the side to find Howard Link fast asleep. He hated how he had to be followed around everywhere in his supposed 'home'. It made him feel like he was about to do something wrong but that's what most if not all people thought nowadays anyway.

After laying there for another minute, he gladly took the opportunity to walk down the dead halls alone. Quietly, he exited his room and began walking down the nearby hallway. The steady fall of his footsteps relaxed his troubled mind. Before he realized it, he found himself outside at the entrance to the Black Order, out in the pouring rain. He didn't know what possessed him to do this but as his hair and clothes slowly began to get drenched, he sat down criss-cross and simplied just stared out into the horizen. He sat there unmoving, with only the rise and fall of his chest and the occassional blink now and then.

This is what his life felt like now. He was the earth and the rain was the transformation between himself and the 14th. Once the rain disappears, the new earth would be the 14th. That was just a simple way of putting it. He knew for a fact that he wasn't going to give up easily but he was fighting a losing war and he knew that deep-down. And now the question he was asking himself was, why? Why him? Was this fate or was it another curse? Was his life with Mana a mere lie? Did his father, the man he loved, love him for who he was? Or was he so obssessed with the past to only love the memories of the 14th that he harbored inside?

That last question had triggered the tears to come. As they silently fell, mingling with the rain, he gritted his teeth as his body began to tremble. He closed his eyes tight and slammed his shaking fists down on the earth. As soon as they made contact, he let loose a loud, frustrated and upset yell. He wasn't sure if anyone heard but he woun't let it bother him. Staying like that for another couple of seconds, he regained his composure and sat back up with his back staright and returned to his pose. The only difference now was that the tears continued to fall and his eyes were unfocused, all hope diminishing. This is what he felt like during these troubled times. His happy facade that he had on most of the time was only to reassure everyone that he wouldn't let that stop him.

But did it reassure him at all?

He knew he could get sick for just simply sitting out here but that was the least of his worries. He had thought about leaving once but what difference would that make, if any. He would simply be hunted down and possibly killed on sight if it came to it. If matters became to difficult for his friends to deal with only then would he use that option. It could be a scapegoat the very least. But he didn't want to leave. He would be away from his friends and also Lenalee. Hell, he'd probably miss even Bakanda (aka-Kanda). But he already felt like he was away from his friends. When news had spread throughout the Order about him and the 14th, most of his friends began distanting themselves for him, the only exception being Lenalee. And for that he was grateful.

Hiding within the shadows of the entrance to the Order, Lavi quietly stood and watched Allen do nothing but sit there. The old panda had ordered him to go keep an eye on him when they had heard the yell while they had been recording their previous mission. He hated to admit it but, he was purposely distancing himself from Allen. He wanted to be at his side, supporting his best-friend through this trauma but he was a Bookman. Bookmen must stay at the side lines and simply record. That and nothing else. But ever since he had first come to the Order, that life style changed as he began making real friends and truly having a real smile.

He couldn't take just sitting on the side lines anymore this time. Allen, the kid he thought of as his little brother, was sitting in the dark alone and scared. No matter how many times he had seen him use that happy facade as a mask, he could tell that he was really hurting inside. He let out a sigh and walked out of the shadows and towards Allen. Once he reached him, he bent down and placed a hand on his shoulder. He could feel and see him visible jump but also tense up.

"Why don't you come back inside, Im sure Lenalee will get worried if you end up catching a cold."

The young boy began to relax but did not get up. The only sign of him knowing he had heard him was that he turned his toward him slighly for a few seconds before returning to looking forward. The red head let out another sigh before asking, "Mind if I join you?"

Again with no reply. But he took that as an invitation to sit down. So sit down he did. He also sat criss-cross, exaggerating Allen's brooding face, trying to make him laugh. That triggered no response as well. Now Lavi was running out of ideas until something came to mind, causing him to slighly grin. He turned his head so that he was looking at Allen and happily said, "Beansprout". This triggered a response. But that was only Allen twitching his head and whispering, "My name is Allen."

Now Lavi tried taking another approach, one that he hoped would get him to talk. "Well nice to meet you Allen. I'm Lavi." It was silent at first until Allen replied with, "It's nice to meet you Lavi."

"So Allen, if you don't mind me asking, why are you sitting in the rain?"

"I do mind, I can tell you seem like a caring guy albeit an annoying one but no harm telling you, I guess. I'm sitting out here because I have a lot on my mind. No one seems to trust me."

"Why's that? I've just met you and you look like the trustworthy type albeit a shy one."

"Lavi, I'm getting tired of playing your stupid little game."

"I'm sorry Allen but that was the only way I could get you to talk. I want to help."

Allen quickly got back up onto his feet, looking down at Lavi until he too stood back up on his feet. "Want to help? Want to HELP! I've silently been asking for your help but you do nothing. You sure did look like you wanted to help a week ago!" yelled Allen.

Anger was now in both boys as Lavi yelled back, "Hey, I can't help it if I can't be there for you all the time! I'm a Bookman and I can't get involved no matter how much I want to. If I do, gramps will probably make us leave! Now do you want that? You really are pathetic if you can't see that Lenalee is helping you!"

That was the breaking point. Suddenly, Allen had directed a solid punch to Lavi's face, knocking him back down on the ground, mud splashing everywhere. And now he was back on his feet with his hands locked against Allen's as they tried to overpower the other. "So what if I'm pathetic but...can't I have my other friends with me. I want it to be like it was before! IT'S JUST NOT FAIR!"

Allen lost his footing and Lavi took that as chance to bring him down by also punching him in the face. But Allen grabbed a hold of his leg and pulled him down with him. Mud sprayed everywhere as both boys were no wresting in the mud. They were rolling around until they managed to break apart and were now catching their breath. As they stared at one another, they both began to laugh at the other. Lavi was practically rolling in the mud again, holding his sides at how Allen looked. His hair was covered in mud making it look like his previous hair color along with some stray mud running down his forehead. Allen was laughing at how Lavi had his face covered in mud with some in his hair. Both of their clothes were caked with the stuff.

Once they were done laughing, Lavi was the first to get back up once again and he calmly walked over to Allen. As he offered a hand to Allen, he said, "Life isn't always fair but in the end, things will turn around, you'll see. And I'm going to stick with you all the way through it. So now are you ready to come inside?"

Allen stared at the outstretched hand before grabbing it and as he was pulled back up he replied with, "Thank you Lavi. And yes, I do think I'm ready to go back inside."

The two boys silently walked back inside the Order, both grateful at this turn of event, hoping that it would turn out good in the end.


	2. Pain

_Author's Note: I hope you do realize that I do not own D. Gray-man by now. I don't need to repeat myself. Enjoy!_

Ch. 2: Pain

Lenalee was wide awake, thinking about the way Allen had been looking like a couple of days ago. His normal straight white hair looked like it had become wavy, an unusual look for him. His smirk resembled that of a Noah; its icy feel matching his eyes. And his eyes, his eyes seemed to hold more age than usual. They looked sharp, intimidating, and worst of all, calculating. It might have been for only a couple of seconds but she had noticed it. Anyone would have.

Feeling restless from both her thoughts and the pouring rain, she decided to go and look out her window. Sometimes the rain soothed her; others it would drive her crazy. It all depended on how hard it was raining and what mood she was in. Today she welcomed the rain, hoping it might be of some use in drowning out her thoughts.

Sitting on the window sill of the closes window, she stared into the surrounding area, as if peering into a painting. The clouds were dark even in the night sky. The rain was falling hard, causing the earth to turn into mud. Occasionally, thunder and lightning would make itself noticed.

This rain to her symbolized the dark times that surely laid ahead. And things were going to fast for her liking. Allen didn't deserve this. He was already carrying a lot of burdens on his shoulders. If only she could be there for him more. She wanted to alleviate all the pain, the trauma, and the stress he was going through. The loneliness had to go away.

She noticed how everyone had receded away from him and she also saw the pain it would cause him when they distanced themselves. It was understandable but that didn't mean it was right. It's not like he was going to crack any seconded. Right?

Her thoughts were quickly snapped when she saw Allen himself walking out in the rain. _'Allen-kun, if you only knew how I felt about you...' _He stood there for a few minutes before actually sitting down. Worry began to fill her mind for she hated it when her friends would get injured or sick. But it only increased when she noticed his body was shaking, trembling, and he slammed his fists down onto the ground and released a yell. Pain. He was in so much pain. And not physical pain, but emotional pain.

She just about had enough of watching this. She began to get up; tears forming in her eyes, when she noticed someone else enter the scene. Lavi. Of course he would've come down. This had brought back her attention and she hesitantly sat back down to see if Lavi would be of any help. Nowadays, he too stayed somewhat distant and in the shadows. That would make her upset whenever he did for Allen was his friend and if he wanted some of Allen's diminishing trust, he had to help.

He had sat down and was talking to Allen or it seemed like he was trying to talk to Allen for he just sat there. Finally looking like he said something that had hit a nerve, they were now conversing back and forth. But it looked like another nerve was hit because now Allen was on his feet and was now what looked like yelling at Lavi. Great, Lavi had infuriated Allen.

Now both boys were yelling at each other. Whatever Lavi had said next must've pissed Allen off even more because now Allen had punched him in the face. Before realizing it, both boys were now in a brawl with each other. Now this was all she could take anymore.

Tears running down her face, she shot straight up onto her feet and proceeded to run out of her room, to the entrance. She had to stop this before they destroyed their friendship forever. Not wanting to wake others, she didn't activate her Dark Boots so this run wouldn't be as fast. Tears continued to cascade down her smooth face as she urged herself to go faster.

Finally reaching the entrance, she quickly but gracefully stopped when she noticed Allen and Lavi were now back inside covered in mud. Both appeared to be at a silent and mutual understanding with one another as they both saw her. Taking in that she was crying, Allen immediately stepped forward, concern sketched across his face.

"Lenalee, what's wrong?" all urgency in his voice.

"I just saw you and Lavi fighting outside. I didn't want you guys to end up hating each other so I came to stop it. You two shouldn't be fighting. You guys are best friends."

Despair and worry were on his features as he listened to her. When she had finished, he hesitantly but fluidly moved the back of his less dirty hands across one of her tear stained cheeks, successfully wiping away tears without leaving mud on her face. In the corner of her eye, she noticed Lavi carrying a huge and sligh grin on his face.

"Thank you, Lenalee, for being there for me. Lavi and I have made up and are going to work through this together, the three of us. Even if everyone else turns away, I know I can always trust you two. And if you weren't there for me Lenalee, I don't know what I'd do…"

Catching his words, both exorcists began to madly blush from his words. It may not seem much to others but to them, it was like saying without her, he wouldn't be himself anymore even though there was a possibility of that happening anyways. Lavi was laughing at their flustered faces, earning himself glares from them both.

"Man…you two sure get easily embarrassed…"

His words were cut off as Lenalee delivered a kick to his head and Allen doing the same with a punch, sending him back several feet. Stars were circling around his head as he lifted his index finger in a knowing way before mumbling, "And…sure are…easily…angered…". He dramatically sighed before falling unconscious.

"Maybe we shouldn't have done that Allen-kun." Said Lenalee, now worried that they might have gone a bit too far.

"Nah, I think he deserved it. He'll be ok. I'll take him back to his room. I'll walk you back to your room if you like."

"Thank you Allen-kun but I think you should bring Lavi back to his room first. I'll see you in the morning. Goodnight Allen-kun."

He gave a small smile before saying, "Goodnight…Lenalee."

She smiled back before walking back up to her room, glad that what she thought would happen was wrong but that didn't solve everything. It was still undeniable and inevitable that Allen would change into the 14th. The question was, when?

_Author's Note: Alright, I've managed to update quickly but don't take it for granted. This might be the fastest I'll ever update since school starts tomorrow for me. Sorry if there isn't enough dialogue for your liking, I just wanted to set the mood for the story first. I promise that I'll try to add some dialogue in the next chapter. I thinking some chapters will have songs in them, if you have any suggestions, I'll gladly put them into consideration. Thank you and please review._


	3. Reflections

Ch. 3:Reflections 

Morning gladly came and shined down onto the looming Black Order. Inside, everyone was going about their business, most of them going to get some breakfast to start off the day. The cafeteria was bustling with finders, employees, and the occasional exorcist. The only thing that seemed out of place to anyone who was a new comer was the huge stack of plates and the skinny white-haired exorcist shoveling the food down.

Allen continuously ate his 'daily' amount of breakfast while Howard Link annoyingly stared at him in disgust and boredom. Luckily, Link was a very sound sleeper and didn't wake up to find him gone or covered in mud. That little excursion would be kept a secret from him. The only other person at the table was Lenalee. His other friends were no where to found.

Krory and Miranda had been assigned a mission together not two days ago. Kanda was probably out training, like always, or locked up in his room, probably sulking or something like that. Allen didn't really care about what Kanda was up to, so long it didn't involve himself. Who knows what was keeping Lavi. Either he was still out cold or was swamped with work that Bookman have given him to do.

Once both Allen and Lenalee had finished there meals, he had agreed to help Lenalee bring down some coffee to the science department. They were surely in dire need of their bitter elixir. Walking steadily with a tray in between their hands, Link closely followed behind them. No talk was issued between them as they continued to walk in a relaxing silence. Making a quick side glance, Allen could see that Lenalee's hair was well on its way to growing back. Personally, he thought she looked beautiful no matter how the difference of her hair made her look. She was still the same Lenalee. Nothing would change that.

Something caught his attention as he returned to looking straight. He turned his head to the right and saw a reflection off the reflextive glass of the windows that ran along the wall. It was show casing some of the scientist going about another one of their experiments. But that wasn't what drew his gaze to that particular area. It was the fact that it wasn't his own reflection in the window.

Still walking while looking forward, carrying a tray of coffee, was that of the 14th. He still looked same, nothing out of the usual norm when he would sometimes come into his dreams. A slightly portly man that had no facial features what so ever, with the exception of unending pools of white for eyes and a demented white smile that curved at the ends. Then, the 14th's head turned to look at Allen face to face, mimicking Allen's stride. He then did something that caught Allen off guard.

_'Good morning…it's a pleasure to see you again…Allen Walker…'_

Allen proceeded to stop and slack his hold on the tray, causing it to fall out of his grasp. Utter shock and disbelief was on his features, showing greatly in his eyes. Not once had the 14th ever spoken to him outside of his dreams, or rather nightmares.

Lenalee stopped as she turned around to find Allen just standing there, staring at a glass window with coffee running along the ground and his shoes, Link ramming into Allen while he wasn't paying much attention. He didn't so much as budge when Link had come to an abrupt stop soon after he had walked into him. All he was doing was staring at a window. A window that showed nothing that would seem to cause him to stop like this. Surely something had to be there if Allen was looking at the glass in insurmountable fear.

Link was shaking him by the shoulder, trying to get his attention back from staring at the stupid glass with nothing remotely interesting on the other side, or at least that's what he thought. Luckily, Lenalee was the charm, for when she placed a hand on his opposite shoulder and whispered, "Allen-kun, are you alright?", his dazed look disappeared. Immediately his attention snapped back to reality and he turned to look at her, still holding the same look he had just a few seconds ago. When seeing the worry and concern in her eyes, his features turned into one that was apologetic.

"Yeah…I'm fine."

"Are you sure? You didn't look like it before…"

"I told you, I'm FINE!" snapped Allen.

Lenalee cringed back in fear at how harsh his words had become and the newly sparked anger in his eyes, some of the mugs teetering on the edge of the tray. Realizing he had snapped back at her, his face became downcast in shame, his bangs covering up his eyes.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you like that. It was my fault. Maybe it would be better if you just brought the coffee to the science department without me. Again, Lenalee, I'm sorry."

Link silently watched their conversation, taking note of every detail that was happening so that he could report it back to headquarters when the time came. Bending down, Allen had picked up the lone tray and placed it under his arm as he retrieved the broken fragments of the fallen mugs, complete disregard for the fact that the fragments were piercing his skin. He then turned around and began his way slowly back to the kitchen to deposit the mess he made, Link once again following silently behind him.

All she could do was watch his receding form, still shocked at what had happened. A single tear slid down her face before she mumbled, "I want to help you but you can't just keep on pushing me away." She turned back to the direction of her destination and continued her expedition alone.

**DGMDGMDGM**

After making sure that the remainder of the coffee mugs had made it back to the kitchen, he retreated back to his room, slamming the door into Howard's face before locking it to make sure he wouldn't be able to come in. Thoughts of what had happened continued to swim in his head. It seemed like the 14th was getting stronger and that wasn't good. Nothing about this whole situation was good to begin with. Link continued his ranting behind the locked door, threats being sent to him.

"If you don't open this door soon, I'm going to get Komui himself to break down the door. And if that doesn't work, I'll send for the Crows to come and take you to headquarters and lock you up. And then you'll never see your friends again, including Lenalee!"

Allen simply sighed before sitting up and staring at the door, quietly saying, "Well, I wouldn't want that now would I?" The only response given was that of Timcanpy fluttering around his head. He was going to milk the time he had left with his friends and Lenalee. They were all he was fighting for now.

As he got to the door, he lifted a hand in the motion of opening the door when a katana shot out from the side of the door, sliding down as it broke part of the lock that served in holding the door so that it wouldn't move. Slowly, the door opened outward, revealing an extremely pissed Kanda and a sweat dropping Link behind him. Now Allen's sweat dropped as well. Maybe this was how he was going to die. Being chopped down by an annoyed Kanda.

Kanda kept Mugen pointing directly at Allen's throat as he angrily yelled, "Will you let this stupid idiot in Breansprout! How am I suppose to meditate with him yelling about you not letting him in your room. You do this again, and it's your head, GOT IT BEANSPROUT!"

"Yeah, I think I get it Bakanda."

Kanda was already walking out when he had said this. He stopped in mid-step, his head twitching to the side before he continued back to his room. There was another time and place to plot Allen's death. Now wasn't the time.

Link quickly shuffled back into their shared room as Allen went to shut the door. He let a heavy sigh before returning to his bed, going back to just laying there like before. Thoughts of what was to come crept into his head, thoughts about how he had to keep himself away from her following soon after.

_'I know now that continuing to be with her will only put her in more danger. I need to protect her, no matter what. If it comes down to it, I'll make Lavi swear to me. Swear to me that he'll kill me if it came down to the point of me turning into the 14__th__. I won't be able to live with myself if something were to happen to her and it was because of me. I can't deny the way I feel about her but I can't accept it either. If I do, then it would surely mean death for Lenalee.'_

_Author's Note: Alright, chapter 3 is complete. I'm being very generous so that way it can help balance out the fact that I might not update real soon. S, you better appreciate it. This is very rare. And for another note, I brought in Kanda! I felt like he was being excluded so I made him come on. Please review, they keep me going._


	4. Dreadful Promise

Ch. 4: Dreadful Promise

Lenalee continued her journey to the science department. She slowly made her way down the empty marble halls. She would've probably made it there by now if it weren't for what had occurred just only a few moments ago. She wasn't quite sure what Allen was going through, an example being what happened earlier, and that frightened her. She didn't know what to expect. Was she really helping like she thought she was?

Finally reaching the science department, she dropped off some of the scientist's coffee; being glad that their fuel was being replenished. Quickly running back to the kitchen to grab a new batch of the second half of the scientist's coffee, she returned just as fast and everyone was satisfied. She had saved her brother's mug for last. She felt like checking up on him again.

Finding him fast asleep on his desk, she silently walked over to him and placed his mug on the least cluttered space of his desk. As if a trigger, Komui immediately shot up in his chair, affection and adoring love clearly shown on his beaming face.

"Ah, thank you so much for the coffee Lenalee. I can sure use it right about now. Oh and Lenalee?"

"Yeah nii-san?"

"You've been assigned a mission along with Lavi and-sigh-Allen Walker."

"What's so wrong with Allen?"

"Nothing, it's just that I would rather have you go with just Lavi and not Allen as well but I can't just keep him here for the rest of his days…"

"He's not an animal nii-san! He has feelings you know. Or have you forgotten that?! I can't believe that even YOU, my own brother, are going to tip-toe around like almost everyone else. He's not going to hurt me!"

Anger and sorrow filled her as she yelled at him. Even though she loved him, she also had strong feelings for Allen as well. Regret from his usage of words was evident in his eyes.

"What I mean is, I don't want you to get hurt if Allen were to become a Noah while on the mission. My doubts of him not turning continue to grow with just about each passing day. And if he were to kill you, I don't know what I'd do. I want to protect you!"

_'What was nii-san hinting at? Who said Allen would kill me if not everyone else? Could that mean that…'_

Her thoughts were interrupted when the door had opened and Lavi had entered the room, whistling some tune with is arms crossed behind his head. His eyes were closed as he stood there twirling his miniature hammer subconsciously, still whistling the little tune. When he had finished, he opened his eye, finally aware that both Komui and Lenalee were staring at him.

"I was told that I've been assigned a mission with Lenalee and Allen. I'm sure he'll be here any minute now."

Just like he said, Allen silently entered the room, remaining in front of the door with his head bowed down, not making any eye contact.

"Well, seeing as how you all are here, I'll give you your assignment. Reports have shown that an accumulated amount of akuma have been seen in China. I'm sending you three to investigate. A ship has been prepared for your descent whenever you're ready to leave."

Once he had finished detailing them, the door had opened and closed before they fully registered that Allen was gone. Taking a quick glance back to her brother, Lenalee followed suit and left after Allen. Lavi hung back a little before deciding to leave as well. As he moved to open the door, Komui said, "Keep an eye on them Lavi. I would hate to see something happen to you if something were to befall my dear sweet Lenalee, if you get my drift."

"Yeah, I get it. You don't have to tell me twice. You and the old panda seem to think that I need reminding. I'm going to make sure my buddy is going to get through this."

Silently adding, "Hopefully all in one piece."

Leaving in a orderly fashion, he left without another word. Once he was outside, he let out a heavy sigh that he had been holding without even realizing it. When he left the science department, he found Allen hunched over, his face in his gloved hands, elbows resting on his knees. What was bothering him now?

Walking over and sitting on the bench right beside him, he leaned back against the wall and asked, "What's bothering you now?"

Allen lifted his head from out of his hands and turned it to look at Lavi before looking back down at his feet and whispering, "Nothing…"

"Now now, you can tell me anything. I'm here to help you or did you already forget that?"

"Alright, well…I can't be around Lenalee."

"Care to elaborate?"

"My master told me…before he died that…I would kill the one I love and then I would turn into the 14th…"

"What you getting at?" Lavi knew the answer but he needed to make sure.

"I…I like Lenalee…a lot…"

_'Ok Lavi… if you want him to talk… you've got to stay serious.'_

"Have you told her that?"

Turning his head to look at Lavi, the red head could see clearly the shock and disbelief written in his eyes.

"Do you think I would! If I do, and we became a couple, I could kill her. I don't want that to happen! Not while I'm still breathing or in control. And now that we're all on a mission together, I don't know what to do… I'm scared."

"I'm sorry for going back a second but what do you mean by 'still breathing'?"

"Lavi, I need you to promise me something…"

"Allen…" He didn't like where this was going.

"Please, Lavi, don't interrupt me. Now promise me."

"Alright…promise."

"Thank you. Now when it comes down to it and I was turning into the 14th, I want you to…to kill me."

The only visible green eye widened in shock as he shot up out of his seat.

"What?!"

"You heard me…"

"I change my mind! I'm not going to agree to that. I'm not killing my best friend. There has to be another way."

"Damn it Lavi, you promised. Please…I need you to do this for me. I'm not going to make Lenalee do it and I Kanda won't take a second thought and Krory and Miranda are out of the question. Only you can do it."

Seeing the pleading look in his eyes, there was nothing he could do to change his mind. This is what Allen wanted; he had to accept it.

"Alright."

This was too much. He had to leave and clear his mind. Not wanting to see the relief look that was surely on his face, he got up and walked away.

'_Why must everyone think this isn't going to be hard for me.'_

_Author's Note: Alright I managed to do another chapter. Sorry if it's not as good but I've just started high school so it was hard to keep it to the usual standers. Please review._


	5. Into the Ocean

Ch. 5: Into the Ocean

Allen, Lenalee, and Lavi were aboard their ship, well on its way to China. Winds were blowing a little harder than normal but there were no signs of any storm. Hopefully there wouldn't be a storm later in the approaching night. If they were lucky.

With sails puffed out from the wind, the ship was moving faster than with a steady breeze. Standing on one of the sail's masts, hanging onto a cord connected to pulling up or down the sail was Lavi. He had his one visible eye closed, the wind tossing around his hair, full contentment on his face. He had always loved traveling by ship. With the fact that he was wearing a bandana and an eye patch only further the point that he looked like a pirate.

Allen was looking out at the sea, his head resting on his crossed arms as they rested on the railing. A faint smile played across his face as he for once, felt relaxed and at peace. It was almost like he was leaving his troubles but that would change once harsh reality hit him when the mission official began. If only things could be different but life isn't quite that simple. Not his at least.

Lenalee was sitting on one of the steps that led to the main deck. She was glad to see Allen somewhat happier. He needed to get out of the confiding space of the Order and into real fresh air. Not to mention the ever annoying shadow otherwise known as Howard Link. That guy could get really annoying sometimes.

Looks like luck wasn't on their side tonight. As the sky began getting darker, the clouds began to overcast. Soon, the ship was being pelted by heavy rain drops, thunder roaring all around them. The ship shook as the increased multitude of waves pounded against the sides. Foam and water weren't hesitant to join the ship as they went over and soaked the deck.

This had happened so fast that Lavi hadn't had time to safely get down. Now he was hanging on for dear life as the ship rocked back and forth, side to side by the crashing waves. Allen and Lenalee were huddled together, their backs pressed against the sturdy wood of the railing. They didn't want to leave their friend and take shelter in the cabin only to find him gone when they came out. They were going to make sure that he would be ok.

Winds were blowing harshly as they too shook the ship. Poor Lavi was practically digging his finger nails into the hard wood. Why did his so called 'brilliant plans' always seem to backfire on him? But digging your nails into chunks of wood wasn't enough to stay on this ship. A huge wave was accumulating up higher than the ship itself. Catching it from the corner of his visible eye, he slowly turned his head to the side, sweat dropping once he knew what would surely happen.

The wave came crashing down, almost engulfing the entire ship. As the water passed, Allen could be seen clutching Lenalee to him as tight as he could, soaking wet, eyes tight shut. Lenalee wasn't holding back as she clutched to him for dear life, soaking wet, eyes tight shut as well. But there was not sign of Lavi.

Slowly opening their eyes, they noticed that they had been shifted to the other side of the ship. They also noticed that Lavi was missing and let's not forget how close they were. Meeting each other's eyes, both exorcists began blushing madly. Allen had his arms wrapped around her protectively, pressing her gently to his chest. She had her hands and head placed on his chest, causing her to have to look up and him to look down. Separating quickly, they both stood up and ran to the side railings, trying not to fall from the slippery slick floor.

Each of them took opposite sides, looking around desperately for their missing friend. Lenalee was the first to spot him. She had been looking over the left side railing when she saw his red-haired head bob up and then back down. Calling Allen, she turned around to see him run from the other side…..and jump unhesitantly over board. She called out to him again as she barely saw his white hair slowly drift away as he struggled to swim towards Lavi. She was amazed at how unfazed he had seemed to be when it came to jumping out of the ship.

Finally breaking free from her daze, she too jumped over board only this time, activating her Dark Boots and flying over to where Allen was closing in on Lavi. She made it to them once Allen had made it to Lavi.

_I'm just a normal boy_

_That sank when I fell overboard_

_My ship would leave the country_

_But I'd rather swim ashore_

He found him out cold, constantly being pushed and pulled by the raging waves. A couple of times, it had nearly swallowed him whole but he had to keep moving. They needed to save Lavi. He grabbed him by the scruff of his uniform, constantly trying to keep him afloat and allowing himself to sink. Water was continuing to blur his vision, the salt burning his eyes.

_Without a life vest I'd be stuck again_

_Wish I was much more masculine_

_Maybe then I could learn to swim_

_Like 'fourteen miles away'_

He could just barely make her out as she hovered over them, arms outstretched. Instead of grabbing hold of an outstretched hand, he lifted Lavi up as high as he could to the best of his abilitites out of the water, sinking in the process. Once he was released of Lavi's weight, he resurfaced to find Lenalee struggle to make room to carry him back as well.

_Now floating up and down_

_I spin, colliding into sound_

_Like whales beneath me diving down_

_I'm sinking to the bottom of my_

_Everything that freaks me out_

_The lighthouse beam has just run out_

_I'm cold as cold as cold can be…_

_Be…_

"Lenalee, you need to take Lavi back to the ship. You're going to have to leave me here while you bring him back. Once Lavi is safe and is going to be ok, then you can come back and get me. Don't worry, I'll be fine." Bellowed Allen, putting on a fake smile, hoping it would reassure her.

_I want to swim away but don't know how_

_Sometimes it feels just like I'm falling in the ocean_

_Let the waves up, take me down_

_Let the hurricane sit in motion, yeah_

_Let the rain of what I feel right now come down_

_Let the rain come down_

He knew she probably didn't believe him but she had to leave him behind and catch up with the ship. Confusion and distraught played in her eyes, watering in the process. It was hard to distinguish the tears and the rain drops as they both ran down her face. Taking one last look at Allen, she flew away as fast as the weight of carrying Lavi and the resisting wind would let her.

_Where is the coastguard?_

_I keep looking each direction_

_For a spotlight, give me something_

_I need something for protection_

_Maybe flotsam, junk will do just fine_

_The jetsam sunk, I'm left behind_

_I'm treading for my life, believe me_

_(How can I keep up this breathing?)_

He let out a sigh of relief before realization dawned on him in the form of a wave. And to make matters worst, he wasn't the greatest swimmer. He had surprised even himself when he had swam over to Lavi like it was second nature. Now, with the adrenaline gone, he was helpless game for the hungry ocean. Struggling to keep afloat, he was constantly knocked around by the waves. He was getting tired and didn't know how long he could keep it up.

_Not knowing how to think_

_I scream aloud, begin to sink_

_My legs and arms are broken down_

_With envy for the solid ground_

_I'm reaching for the life within me_

_How can one man stop his ending_

_I thought of just your face_

_Relaxed, and floated into space_

Suddenly, a fairly good sized wave came crashing down, plummeting down into the water. He was down a couple feet, struggling to resurface and get some air. It was then he noticed some rope was connected around his ankle which in turn, was connected to a piece of fallen cargo. No matter how high he got, he was sent back down. Panic was starting to form in him as his strength ebbed away and air supply diminished. This wasn't how he pictured his death. At least, not some of the possible outcomes.

_I want to swim away but don't know how_

_Sometimes it feels like I'm falling in the ocean_

_Let the waves up, take me down_

_Let the hurricane set in motion, yeah_

_Let the rain of what I feel right now come down_

_Let the rain come down_

The current underwater was making him dizzy. It proceeded to knock him around and around, just begging him to slip up and open his mouth. Now the lack of oxygen was becoming unbearable. Looking back down, he could make in the water what appeared to be never ending darkness. His jaw slightly laxed and in came sea water. Eyes widening with realization, instinct had made him open his mouth and in came more.

_Now waking to the sun_

_I calculate what I had done_

_Like jumping from the bow, yeah_

_Just to prove that I knew how, yeah_

_It's midnight's late reminder of _

_The loss of her, the one I love_

_My will to quickly end it all_

_Set front row in my need to fall_

As if trying to cough it out, Allen began thrashing around in search of air. The currents were spinning him around, causing him to close his eyes tight and thrash around harder. This was it, he was going to die.

_Into the ocean, end it all_

_Into the ocean, end it all_

_Into the ocean, end it all_

_Into the ocean…end it all_

Finally succumbing to the water, he slowly relaxed and allowed himself to sink. With half lidded eyes, he watched to surface drift away from him as he sunk deeper into an abyss of darkness. He didn't know if it was his imagination or not but he thought he heard something drop into the water. It probably was nothing.

_Into the ocean(goodbye) end it all(goodbye)_

_Into the ocean(goodbye) end it all(goodbye)_

_Into the ocean(goodbye) end it all(goodbye)_

Then something seemed to wrap around him tightly. Suddenly, he was slowly being pulled up, only to stop when he felt a snap all the way down to his ankle, where the rope was tied. When he was let go, he slowly opened his eyes, keeping them half lidded. Whatever had grabbed him was out of his line of vision. His body wanted to shut down but his mind was saying otherwise. He had to stay awake as long as he could.

_I want to swim away but don't know how_

_Sometimes it feels like I'm falling in the ocean_

_Let the waves take me down_

_Let the hurricane set in motion, yeah_

_Let the rain of what I feel right now come down_

_Let the rain come down_

Once the weight of the rope was released from around his ankle, he groggily brought his head down, his vision further blurring. Then he felt something wrap around him from behind, pulling him back up. He couldn't fight the feeling anymore. He allowed his mind to drift and his eyes to fall shut. In doing so, his body went completely limp. However or whatever was bringing him up to the surface began swimming faster. That was the last thing his mind registered before shutting down.

_Into the ocean(goodbye)end it all(goodbye)_

_(Into space)_

_Into the ocean(goodbye)end it all(goodbye)_

_Into the ocean(goodbye)end it all(goodbye)_

_Into the ocean(goodbye)end it all(goodbye)_

_Into the ocean(goodbye)end it all(goodbye)_

_Into the ocean(goodbye)end it all(goodbye)_

_(I thought of just your face)_

_Into the ocean(goodbye)end it all(goodbye)_

_Into the ocean(goodbye)end it all(goodbye)_

_Into the ocean(goodbye)end it all(goodbye)_

_Into the ocean(goodbye)end it all(goodbye)_

_Authors Note: I do not own the song Into the Ocean by Blue October. Or D Gray-man. Now that we got that out of the way, how'd you think of the chapter? I thought it was better than the one before so I hoped you enjoyed it. Probably won't update for a while but who knows. Please review._


	6. Seeing things

Ch. 6: Seeing things

As she made it back to the ship with Lavi, Lenalee's thoughts kept turning back to Allen. He was lying to her and she knew that, but still, he had been left alone. For all she knew, he could have drowned by now. This wasn't helping at all. First, she had to concentrate on bringing Lavi back to the ship. Then she could worry about Allen.

After flying for what seemed like hours, she found the ship and descended down onto it. As she landed, she almost fell from the rocking of the ship. The storm raged on, its multitude slowly diminishing down. She dragged him down to the cabin area and told one of the crew members to look after him for now.

All other thoughts aside, she went back up to the deck and activated her Dark Boots for a second time. Flying back to the direction of Allen was easier without wind resistance and the weight of Lavi in her arms. Coming upon the area where she had left him, she began to frantically search for him or at least a sign of him.

What if she was too late?! The only thing left to try would be diving into the water herself. Going on gut instinct, she dove downed into the water, hoping she would find him.

She began looking and looking until, sure enough, she found him. She quickly resurfaced and went straight back down when she had caught her breath. When she was back down, she found him further down, this time his body was relaxed. That wasn't good.

Going down to his level, she wrapped her arms around him. Once she had a good grip, she placed her head against his chest, trying desperately to hear any sign of a heartbeat. He was still alive but only by a thread. She then began swimming upwards towards the surface. But something was putting up resistance. She let him go and swam back down, finding the source as a piece of rope that was tied around his ankle and in turn, was tied around a fallen piece of cargo. Hastily untying it, she released its hold around is ankle and went back up and wrapped her arms around his chest. She had did it to wear a hand was pressed against his chest where his heart was, making sure it was still beating. Things seemed to get better. She had found him and they would be free from their watery prison. But something went wrong.

Half way to the surface, Allen's already slow beating heart stopped. Not feeling the beating of his heart anymore, she sped up their ascent to the surface. Panic was filling her when she finally broke the surface of the ocean, the storm dying down. She was exhausted but she had to bring him back to the ship. She had to bring him back to life. She just had to.

Finally she made it back to the ship; rain had already begun to seize and the sky was starting to turn a black night sky. When she was over the ship, she landed down with a thud. She was too tired to care that she hadn't landed properly. She was breathing heavily and her body begged her to take a brake. But she couldn't. Her heart wouldn't let her.

Crawling over to his lifeless form, groping the darkness, she grabbed a hold of him and flipped him over onto his back. She then proceeded to pump down on his chest. After a couple of pumps, she bent her head down and placed an ear against his chest. Still no pulse. She tried again and there was still no change. Pinching his nose, she moved his head and began breathing air into him. After doing that for a couple of minutes, she went back to doing CPR.

When she moved to breathe more air into him, his heart finally jump started and he began to cough up water. He sucked one large breathe of air before relaxing and allowing himself to drift off into sleep. Tears escaped her eyes as she gave a small smile of relief. Closing her eyes, she finally let the tiredness consume her. Falling to the side, she landed on his chest and both exorcists were out cold, in dire need of some rest.

_Allen walked down a forest path, oak trees lining the sides. He could here the faint sound of a piano being played in the distance. Immerging from the path, he entered into a newly changed white room. A portly man had his back to him as he played the piano. Suddenly the music stopped._

_Bringing Allen back to the moment, he noticed the 14__th__ standing with his back still to him, only this time, laughing. A laugh that seemed dry but ecstatic at the same time._

"_Allen…Allen, Allen, Allen. When will you learn that you can't fight me. We're on the same side. But, that doesn't mean I'll make life easy for you."_

_He turned around and the sight made Allen visible pale and his yes widened in shock. The 14__th__ now faced him with one arm outstretched, in his grasp was Lenalee. She was struggling for breath as he tightened his hold around her neck. Her eyes were pleading as she tried to loosen his grip. Finding that to be useless, she tried to reach out to the shocked Allen, struggling just to say his name._

_His attention had been drawn to Lenalee that he didn't realize that the 14__th__ had changed; to look exactly like Allen. The Allen copycat bent his head down, whispering something Allen couldn't hear before licking down her neck with his tongue. The real Allen was frozen in shock. It was like watching himself in a mirror. He couldn't do anything._

_Lenalee continued to struggle, the 14__th__ proceeding to kiss her neck and cheek. Finally moving his head back to its previous position, he looked back to Allen. Both Allens looked at the other, the 14__th__'s eyes cold and sharp, Allen's eyes traumatized and fearful. Breaking the gaze, the 14__th__ looked back down to Lenalee, who had seized to struggle and instead made gasping noises from her lack of oxygen._

_A smirk was on his face as he tightened his already strong grip around her neck. Then, a shrill snapping sound echoed around the blank white endless room. Now the air was caught inside the real Allen's chest. What he saw had brought him to the brink of insanity. Lenalee had seized to move at all. She was dead._

_Releasing his hold, he let her fall with a slump. By now, the 14__th__'s grin was brimming up to the sides of his face in an insane pleasure. _

"_This is what you are. This is what will happen. And this is what you'll become!"_

_By now, Allen had fallen to his knees, eyes glued to Lenalee's lifeless body, her eyes staring back at him. Slowly turning his head away, his eyes dull, he saw now that the copycat had grey skin, stigmata running across his forehead, white hair now a silver grey, eyes once silver now gold, and his black left arm inverted to white. His whole attire inverted so that the main color was now white and the secondary colors were now black and red. The dull look in his eyes didn't change as he slowly switched his gaze back to Lenalee. Tears began falling down soundlessly as they made streaks across his cheeks. Seeing this, the 14__th__ proceeded to laugh and sneer at Allen._

_He knew it was just a dream but that didn't mean it couldn't be true. With each passing day, his control over the 14__th__ was slacking if only slightly and sooner or later he would loose control. Something he was having trouble fully realizing._

_The 14__th__ walked over to him, knelt down, and whispered, "And how can you forget your friends." Now dead bodies of everyone he knew and cared about laid lifeless, surrounding them. This was it, this was his limit. He got into the futile position, muttering three words to no one in particular._

"_This isn't real. This isn't real. This isn't real. This isn't real…"_

_Finally, everything seemed to turn black._

Jolting up real fast, Allen let out a surprised and distressed scream, cold sweat clearly seen on his face. His breathing was labored, eyes moving uneasily around his surroundings. He was back in the Order, inside his room. He got out of bed, finally noticing his broken ankle and limped over to the full body mirror he had inside his room. He didn't know what desire it was to look at himself in the mirror, he just did.

_Crawling in my skin_

_These wounds they will not heal_

_Fear is how I fall_

_Confusing what is real_

Reaching the mirror, he stared at himself, placing a hand against the smooth surface. The different shirt he had been put in was left unbuttoned, revealing the huge scar running down the right side of his chest. Relief washed over him as the reflection in the mirror was that of himself. He leaned forward and rested his head against the mirror's surface. Closing his eyes, he allowed his mind to drift off, not noticing the sound of the door opening. But he did notice the laughing.

_There's something inside me_

_That pulls beneath the surface_

_Consuming, confusing_

_This lack of self control I fear_

_Is never ending_

Opening his eyes, he slowly lifted up his head and stared into the mirror. It wasn't his reflection that was staring back at him anymore. It was the 14th. A burning desire wielded up inside him, his teeth grinding against each other. _'You can't run from me forever.'_ His eyebrows knitted forward as the laughing ensued. With his aggression rising as the laughing continued, he brought back a clenched fist and punched against the mirror.

_Controlling_

_I can't seem to find myself again_

_My walls are closing in_

_(I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take)_

_I've felt this way before_

_So insecure _

Cracks spread across the mirror, the larger more far apart ones being around the edges and the smaller ones being clustered together where his fist laid. Shards of mirror stuck against his hand, blood oozing from the cuts. Closing his eyes again, he relaxed until he heard the laughing again. Looking at the mirror again, he saw in his place the Noah form of himself. It was mocking him.

_Crawling in my skin_

_These wounds they will not heal_

_Fear is how I fall_

_Confusing what is real_

Kicking the mirror down didn't help at all. He still could hear the insane laughter echoing around his head and what seemed like his room. He wanted to make the laughing stop. His anger was at its max. Grabbing hold of an empty vase resting on his desk, he turned quickly to the side, flinging the vase across the room with enough force to shatter it upon impact with the wall. Breaking the vase didn't help either. It only made him angrier.

_Discomfort, endlessly has pulled itself upon me_

_Distracting, reacting_

_Against my will I stand beside my own reflection_

Now he was on a path of destruction. He upturned the table in his room, ripped apart the painting hanging on the wall. Pretty much anything he got his eyes on. His attention was drawn away from the audience. When there was nothing left, he looked around hastily at the damage

'_You know, Mana really didn't love you. He loved me.'_

_It's haunting how I can't seem _

_To find myself again_

_My walls are closing in_

_(Without a sense of confidence)_

_(I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take)_

_I've felt this way before_

_So Insecure_

Turning around, he let his eyes widen and face to pale. This had to be a trick. Standing in front of him was none other than the 14th. Stepping back in shock, he watched what he thought was the 14th step forward. No, he couldn't show what he thought was the 14th weakness. With clenched fists, he shot forward and grabbed the scruff of the 14th's shirt. Lifting him up slightly off the ground, he used all his strength to swing him to the other side of the room.

_Crawling in my skin_

_These wounds they will not heal_

_Fear is how I fall_

_Confusing what is real_

Breathing heavily, he slowly walked over to the knocked out supposed 14th but only to stop when a hand was placed on his shoulder. He shrugged it off and didn't hesitate to punch whatever had touched him. Whoever it was, they were knocked back out of his room. Catching something from the corner of his eye, he double taked when he saw Howard sprawled on the floor. In the place of the 14th. Panic now engulfed him as he moved to his door, to see who he had hurt. Now his blood went cold. Huddled on the floor, rubbing her red cheek was Lenalee.

_Crawling in my skin_

_These wounds they will not heal_

_Fear is how I fall_

_Confusing, confusing what is real_

Both had caught the other's eyes. He didn't have enough time to think when he was suddenly knocked back into his room, the wind knocked out of him as the handle of a hammer pressed down on his throat. He couldn't feel the floor underneath his feet as he was pressed against a wall, struggling for some air. He looked back up and didn't know what he was seeing anymore as cold sweat began to cover his face. Staring back at him was another 14th.

_There's something inside of me that pulls beneath the surface_

_Consuming_

_(Confusing what is real)_

_This lack of self control I fear is never ending_

_Controlling _

_(Confusing what is real)_

He couldn't understand what he was saying. All it was was mindless noise. Then he was punched across the face and what he thought was the 14th turned into Lavi. And now he could make out what he was saying,

"Listen to me! What's wrong with you?! Are you testing me or something because this isn't cool. Please tell me that you're Allen and not the 14th. Allen…I'm not ready for this…"

"Is…Lena…lee…alright…"

"What?!"

"Is…Lena…lee…al…right…"

Allen turned his gaze to the door frame to see a fearful Lenalee and a distraught Komui. Suddenly his vision began blurring and before he knew it, he was punched in the gut by Malcolm C Levrier himself. The pressure of the hammer handle was gone and his body hurt everywhere. He tried to get up but the only support he got was from a kick in the gut. Coughing up blood, he proceeded to reach out a hand to Lenalee and say with vision further blurring, "I'm…sorry…" Now the pain was too much as he winced in response before losing unconsciousness. The last thing he heard was that of a crying Lenalee.

_Author's Note: I do not own the song Crawling by Linkin Park. Or D Gray-man. Sorry if things seemed rushed a little for you but this is what I wanted to happen. Please review, they are some of the fuel that keeps me writing._


	7. Numb

Ch. 7: Numb

With the snap of his fingers, Malcolm C. Levier summoned his two accompanying Crow members. Giving a slight nod of his head, the two members each grabbed hold of one of Allen's arms and proceeded to drag him away. A satisfied sneer was on his face as he watched Allen be helplessly pulled away. By now, Komui had gained the courage to speak.

"How dare you take one of my exorcists' away! What gives you the right?"

"I was told by Howard Link that a one Allen Walker has been acting out of character. What had just transpired only furthers my report and my point. Wouldn't you agree Komui? It was, in fact, your sister that got punched by Allen Walker."

At this remark, Komui looked away. They had both witnessed Lenalee be punched out of Allen's room. Seeing as no one else was there besides a knocked out Link, one would assume that Allen himself did it. Maybe this is what needs to be done.

Seeing this sign of defeat, the look in Malcolm's eyes showed pure triumphed. Also noticing it, Lavi decided he should be the one to speak up. Lenalee, by now, had runned after Allen, not wanting to hear her fears brought to reality.

"Where are you taking him?"

"That is for me to know. But I'm feeling very generous today, seeing as how I've finally gotten what I wanted. He is being brought into an isolated room on the top floor. Only myself, the Crow members, and-sigh-Komui have access to the room. Others will not be permitted access upon entry. We'll be leaving for headquarters tomorrow night."

He moved to the door, stopping once outside the room to say,

"You are welcomed to stand outside though. You might just hear Allen's screams of pain. Now if you don't mind, I've got a prisoner to interrogate."

Malcolm didn't take a look back as he continued his way towards his destination. Lavi was at a disbelief. They were going to torture Allen for information he probably didn't know. And they were going to enjoy it.

"Can't you stop them Komui?"

"I can't. They have just as much authority as I do and they aren't even in my jurisdiction. I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what! For yourself? That you couldn't do anything but watch. I don't think that's it. I think you're just sorry because you have nothing you can do that would make Lenalee happy in this situation. Because you know, deep down, that someday, she's going to leave you and probably start her own life with…"

"That's enough!"

_I'm tired of being what you want me to be_

_Feeling so faithless, lost under the surface_

_I don't know what you're expecting of me_

_Put under the pressure of walking in your shoes_

Both the angry Lavi and the downcast Komui who was letting Lavi dump on him, turned to see a disgruntled Bookman. He had heard their little conversation. And he did not look pleased.

_(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)_

_Every step that I take is another mistake to you _

_(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)_

"Lavi, there's work to be done."

Begrudgingly, Lavi complied and left with Bookman. That left a depressed Komui in Allen's room.

*&*

Walking silently side by side, Bookman was the first to break the ice.

_I've become so numb I can't feel you there_

_Become so tired so much more aware_

_I'm becoming this all I want to do_

_Is be more like me and be less like you_

"I've just spoke to Malcolm and he is willing to allow us entry as well. We shall go there now and record the events that should unfold."

By now, Lavi had stopped in his tracks. At first, the very first emotion that coursed through him was shock. Even the Old panda didn't care. If he did, he didn't show it. All he was interested in was how Allen would impact history, seeing as how he was prophesized as the Destroyer of Time and now would possibly turn into a Noah. Then anger replaced his shock.

_Can't you see that you're smothering me?_

_Holding too tightly, afraid to loose control_

_Cause everything that you thought I would be_

_Has fallen apart right in front of you_

"No…"

"What?"

_(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)_

_Every step that I take is another mistake to you_

_(Caught in the undertow just caught in the undertow)_

_And every second I waste is more than I can take_

"I said no. I'm not going along with this."

"Lavi, you are a bookman apprentice. You must record the events that impact history. It is your duty."

_I've become so numb I can't feel you there_

_Become so tired so much more aware_

_I'm becoming this all I want to do_

_Is be more like me and be less like you_

"Well I'm putting duty aside this time. I'm not watching my best friend die!"

"Have you forgotten your place already?! You must stay detached from the world and within the shadows. If you can't stick with that then I think you'll need to clear your head by leaving the Order for awhile. If that doesn't work, then I'll have no other choice but to strip you from your Bookmen duties, something I rather not do unless I have to. You are the only successor and you are needed."

_And I know I may end up failing too_

_But I know you were just like me_

_With someone disappointed in you_

"I'm sorry, but you're doing this alone. I'm not just going to stand around here and do nothing! Do what you want to me after this is all over but for right now, I'm going to help Allen."

"Lavi, you don't know what you are doing."

_I've become so numb I can't feel you there_

_Become so tired so much more aware_

_I'm becoming this all I want to do_

_Is be more like me and be less like you_

"I sure as hell don't know what I'm doing! But whatever I do end up doing, it surely won't be staying in the shadows."

"Then you leave me no choice. As of today, you are removed from the Bookmen clan for now. If your actions show any signs of continuing, then you'll be removed from the clan permanently. Now get out of my sight."

"Done."

_I've become so numb I can't feel you there_

_I'm tired of being what you want me to be _

_I've become so numb I can't feel you there_

_I'm tired of being what you want me to be_

Lavi left Bookman by walking back in the opposite direction, taking a different route to Allen's holding area.

_Author's Note: I know this is short but felt like if I were to continue, I would make the story shorter and I don't want that. Thanks for all the reviews and I hope that you'll stick with the story until the very end. I promise that my next update will be sometime this week. And this time, I will be longer, I promise. Oh, I almost forgot. I don't own Numb by Linkin Park. They are favorite band by the way so expect more songs from them in the story._


	8. Connection

Ch. 8: Connection

Allen woke up groggily, slowly taking in his surroundings. That is, if he could see. He could feel the fabric substance of a blind fold obscuring his vision. He couldn't make heads or tails at where he was but he didn't like it. By the positions his arms were in, he could tell that they had been hand-cuffed behind his back. And judging by the fact that he couldn't stand up from his forced knelt position that he was bounded by restraints to his legs.

Suddenly, he heard a sound of something being cracked. The sound brought forth unwanted memories of his previous dream. And now one image would not leave his head. The image of a dead Lenalee, staring back at him with her lifeless eyes. Then a voice from somewhere where Allen couldn't spoke out.

"Are you Allen Walker?"

He didn't quite understand why someone was asking him if he was himself. He was too indulged with the reason of being asked that question that he forgot that he had not answered. And that earned him a strike in the back with a whip. Now he understood what the cracking sound had been before and just why he was shirtless. At first, the pain came but receded just as quickly. But that wouldn't be the last of being whipped. Not by a long shot.

"I will ask you again. Are you Allen Walker?"

"…yes…"

"You were adopted by a one Mana Walker. Is that true? And who, exactly, is he."

Something inside him made him hesitate when answering the question. He began to feel disorientated as the 14th took over. But some part him was still there, he could feel and think but couldn't speak.

"I wouldn't say that. He was my beloved brother, who had the unfortunate privilege to die at a middle age rather than growing old."

The answer had earned him several strikes. This, in turn, sent pain through them both. This had caused the 14th to back off so that he wouldn't feel the pain as well. Maybe it was better that way.

"Answer the question Allen Walker."

"…yes I was adopted by him. All I know of him is that he was a traveling clown and taught me everything I know when it comes to acrobats…I know nothing else…"

"Thank you for your reluctant cooperation. We will be looking into more detailed information on him. His connection to the 14th has led us to believe that you will become the reincarnated 14th, that little outburst only furthers our point. I would like to ask you one last question before we move back to our headquarters with you tomorrow. Who are you going to kill to become the 14th?"

Now that had left Allen silent. This earned him another couple of strikes. By now, his back was burning from the pain. But he wasn't going to break just yet.

"Answer the damn question Noah!"

Anger boiled inside him as his verbal attacker began playing with his head and his heart.

"Is it Lenalee Lee? The sister of Chief Komui Lee. Is she the one you are going to kill in order to become a monster? Is she the one who is going to be hurt the most? Is she the one you…"

This was the peak of his anger and irritation. Shooting up and forward as far as his restraints would allow him, he bellowed out,

"I'M NOT GOING TO HURT HER. SHE'S NOT GOING TO DIE BECAUSE OF ME! YOU LEAVE HER OUT OF THIS AND THE HELL ALONE! YOU HERE ME!!!"

By now, the wiping had ensued, followed by a kick in the gut that forced him into his previous position. All was quiet until the voice had begun to speak again.

"I here you…free for all boys. Do what you want with him. Just make sure he's still alive."

Whoever had been talking must have left because he began to get overwhelmed with strikes from the whip. The pain was too much; he could feel hot blood run down his throbbing back. At first, he gritted his teeth, hiding his pain. But once he felt the whip create lacerations at his neck, he let out screams of pain. Someone grabbed his right arm, applied pressure to his elbow, and caused it to snap from the force. This had caused him to scream louder as the pain coursed through his body. He could feel the blade of knives caress his chest and legs, sinking into his skin every now and then. Punches were being traded off across his face.

The pain was everywhere and the only he could let them know his disdain was to scream. Maybe someone would hear him and come. Someone surely could have heard him by now. Maybe.

Suddenly, someone grabbed a fistful of his snow white hair, jerking his head forward harshly. He could hear the sound of something sizzling and laughter as some unknown form of torture was going to be placed upon him next. He hadn't had anytime to understand what was going to happen when a hot burning pain pressed down hard on his bloody back. This had to be, by far, the most pain he had experienced today. He could feel his actual skin be burned away by the scorching metal as it imprinted a symbol on his right shoulder. Whatever it was going to be scarred onto his back, he did not know. All he knew was that it hurt like hell and he was ready to die. No one was going to help him now.

Finally, the pain was alleviated as he was once again pulled by the hair and pushed forward when the restraints were released from around his ankles. Landing on his broken arm, he let out a cry of displeasure as he rolled over to his left side while he pressed his arm against his back. Right now, he felt physically and emotionally unstable. And it didn't help that he was being laughed at and kicked one last time before he was left alone. To suffer through all this pain alone.

Although he couldn't see, he could still feel and he felt his blood accumulate underneath him, dyeing the edges of his hair a crimson red. How long would he have to stay in this hell hole? Or was this place heaven compared to where they would take him next? And one he couldn't quite help ask himself, this one coming from his heart. Would he ever see Lenalee again? Her elegant black hair that shimmered green in the sun, her ever caring violet eyes that seemed to look right to his heart, and her loving smile that in turn would cause him to smile.

Silent tears slid down pass his blindfold, leaving tracks on his cheeks, one of which was somewhat swelled up from a bruise. His heart yearned for her comfort; begging for her to come to him. And somewhere in his mind, he could feel her presence nearby, her mindset filled with sorrow and despair. From what, he could not tell. And that she was in a lot of emotional pain. His heart wanted to go to her and comfort her, even in his physical state but he didn't even know where he was.

Getting up onto his feet, hands still handcuffed behind his back, he walked over to a wall and began walking along it. Running into the first corner he came across, he collapsed back down onto the ground, making sure he didn't hit his right arm in the process. Curling up into a ball, he allowed his tired body to drift him off to sleep. Sleep was the only thing he had control over these days.

*&*

Lenalee was sitting against a wall opposite of a door. The door that blocked her from reaching Allen. Her legs were pressed against her chest, her head resting on her knees. The once cheerful gleam in her eyes was replaced with a shiny look that you'd get only when you cried. She seemed to be doing that a lot these days.

The tears had started pouring when she had heard Allen's cries of pain. They kept reverberating through her head as it made her heart sink further. The tears began to slow down once all of the members that she had seen enter leave the room, including Bookman. She had tried to break down the door but it was solid proofed and wouldn't budge, which had resulted her to go to her current position.

Tears still continued to fall none the less though. Something inside her was yearning to be at Allen's side, comforting through the pain, the trauma, and the despair. She could feel pieces of his pain and suffering from her heart. He was so close yet so far away.

She didn't know what time it was but that didn't bother her. She had also lost her appetite but that didn't bother her either. She was so focused on the door that she didn't recognize Lavi come and sit by her.

He stared at her for a moment and then back at the door. He understood completely her pain for he was feeling it as well, maybe not to the severity of it though. When he had made the connection that both Lenalee's and Allen's innocence had saved them both, he realized that they had a connection. A bond if you will. A bond that was probably stronger than anything and they had still yet to even understand or know it. Maybe it had something to do with their innocence, but now wasn't the time to dwindle on it for long.

"Lenalee, its dinner time. You need to eat something. I know you've haven't eaten since breakfast. Allen isn't going to go anywhere, at least, not until tomorrow. You should probably get some rest until then. I know he would like to see you one last time before he departs. I'll keep watch for tonight and report if anything happens."

"…ok Lavi…"

Her voice had been so distant and sad that it almost brought tears to his eyes. Getting up, he watched her walk away, turning back to the door when she was too far away to see anymore. He stared at the door before grabbing his hammer and enlarging it to a dissent size that he held in two hands. He wasn't just going to sit there and stare at the door after failed attempts. He was going to pound against that door until he couldn't anymore. He was going to give it everything he got.

_Author's note: See, just like I promised. Thanks for all the reviews people. To the one reviewer that commented about having songs in the story(Sorry, forgot who you were), I'm sorry about the dialogue/lyric mistake in the 6__th__ chapter, I didn't mean to confuse you. But I am planning on using more songs in the story though but not in every chapter. Hope it doesn't deter you from reading my story. Please review._


	9. Photograph

Ch. 9: Photograph 

Lavi slouched down against a wall, his hammer held limply in one hand. Sweat drenched his face, his chest rising up and down rapidly in desperate need for more oxygen and rest. He had been trying to dislodge the door from its hinges for hours and he hadn't left one dent. He didn't want to give up but he was too tired to continue on. He needed some rest.

He closed his only visible eye for a moment of rest. He could spare a couple of minutes of sleep. Right? Now leaning his back on the wall as he laid there, he quickly drifted off to sleep without realizing it. He was out cold.

Quietly walking from around a corner immerged Chief Komui, carrying a bag slung over one shoulder. Having waited there for an hour or so, he took the opportunity to see the condition of Allen. He had gone in secret and wanted to keep it that way. He didn't want to be confronted by Lavi again either. Having already witnessed the affect of having Allen locked up in Lenalee, he wanted to make sure he was at least ok. He hated seeing Lenalee already in so much pain that, he felt it was his duty to check up on him. For the sake of his sister.

Quickly and silently using the code that gave one entry, he entered with no questions asked. The room was dark, the only candle now burned out, causing the only light to come from the only window that hung inside the cell. The moonlight was just enough to illuminate most of the cell, the exceptions being the farthest corners that were hidden in shadows. Dry blood tainted the stone floors, the moonlight causing it to look black against the light grey stone.

Scanning the cell quickly, he found Allen, now lying on his stomach, near one the corners. His head was the only thing that was in range of the moonlight, the rest of his body shrouded in shadows. Producing a key within one of his pockets, he walked over to cell door and opened it, walking inside as he closed the door. Taking the bag off from around his shoulder, he bent down and dragged Allen over so that he was completely within the moonlight.

Standing back up, he could see all the damage that had been down to his back during the torture. Dry blood streaked across his back, some of it caked onto his right shoulder blade. Due to the fact that his right arm was swollen, his elbow beginning to form ugly purple bruises, he could tell it was broken. Noticing some his hair dyed a now brown color, he bent down and began checking for any damage down to his skull. Finding it adequate that no damage was sustained, he gently turned him onto his left side to see what the damage was like.

Most of it was bruises by now, a cut here and there. Some cuts ran down his arm but by now, they had stopped bleeding. Looking at his face, he could make out a dark coloration over his right eye that showed passed the blindfold, making a note that it too was bruised. Turning him slowly back onto his chest, he pulled the bag he had brought with him closer to his reach.

Opening it up, he pulled out a pack of bandages that would be used to help begin the long healing process that it took when having a broken arm. Starting at the top of his arm, he began wrapping it tightly around his arm, and stopping a few inches above his wrist, the hand-cuff preventing him from going further.

Feeling satisfied with his work, he turned back to his bag, and pulled out a rag and a bottle of water. Uncapping the bottle, covered it with the rag and turned upside down, turning it back quickly so that he wouldn't lose more water than was needed for now. Placing the wet rag onto Allen's back, he delicately began wiping away the dry blood, revealing the lacerations and cuts underneath. When the rag became looking inadequate for wiping blood, he would pour some water over it and would go back to wiping whatever dry blood had remained.

The part he had saved for last in cleaning was the caked right shoulder. Make sure the rag would do for this, he began rubbing slightly hard, excavating to find the wound. As the caked on blood began to recede, he couldn't help but be stunned by what he found. Stopping for a moment to fully see the wound, his eyes laid upon the symbol that could be seen better now. What looked like it was burned onto Allen's back was a Chinese symbol, a symbol that Komui knew. The symbol read: Forever Lost.

Depression washed over him as his mind went back to the secret conversation that had been held between him and General Cross before he presumably committed suicide.

"_Komui, would you make sure my idiot apprentice stays out of trouble. I can't count the number of times I've had to save his sorry ass."_

"_I…will. But where are you going?"_

"_I'm getting away from this place, somewhere where I can live in peace for a while. Thank you Komui. That boy has a dark path he must walk down and it's easy to get lost…"_

He neglected to watch Allen like Cross had asked, now look at where he stood. This boy has been through so much, much more than one human has in one lifetime. And he was only 15 years old.

Going back to tending his wounds, he placed a bandage over the symbol, hiding it from those who would know what it said for now. Someone like Lenalee. Washing away the remaining blood on his bangs, he found that there was nothing else he could do for him. Placing all the materials he had taken with him back in the bag, he slung it back onto his shoulder as he stood back up.

Taking one last look at the one exorcist that had been through so much, he left the cell and the room altogether, locking both as he left. Thankfully Lavi was still asleep so this visit wouldn't be known by anyone. It was his little secret.

*&*

It was now the afternoon. The Order was bustling with activity as everyone got ready to watch Allen depart. Some had come because they wanted to say some last words, most had come out of respect for the exorcist, even if it was tiny and they didn't want to admit it. A trail was left open so that the Crows had enough room to walk pass on.

Upon hearing a door open, everyone was silenced as Malcolm and Link first emerged from behind the door, followed by two Crow members, then Allen, and lastly, two more Crow members. Allen had a collar around his neck, a thin chain tide around it as one the Crows pulled him along. His arms were now handcuffed in front of him, a shirt having been hastily put on. The blind fold was off now, but he kept his head down, his eyes half-lidded as he tried not to make eye contact.

He could feel all eyes on him as they continued walking to the entrance and outside into the light. All the attention made him uncomfortable and made him want to get out of this situation even more. He had not expected everyone to see him off. On the contrary, he thought no one would be there, except Lenalee and Lavi.

Finally making it outside, Allen lifted his head up to see Komui, Reever, Krory, Miranda, Lavi, Kanda, and Lenalee all standing there in front of the carriage that would take him away. By now, Miranda was in hysterics as she tried to make since with the situation. Krory was downcast as he stood in silence, watching his friend be taken away as a prisoner. Kanda had his arms folded across his chest as he looked away when Allen had made eye contact with him, the scowl on his face increasing.

The whole group that was guarding Allen stepped aside and stood poised and ready if something where to happen. Malcolm and Link also kept some distance away from them, not caring about what would happen in this farewell.

_There's another world inside of me that you may never see_

_There's secrets in this life that I can't hide_

_Somewhere in this darkness there's a light that I can't find_

_Maybe it's too far away, maybe I'm just blind_

_Maybe I'm just blind_

Lavi walked up to Allen, his hands in his pockets.

"That's some black eye you got there."

"Yeah…I guess it is."

"Well then have this."

Removing one hand that was stuffed in his pocket, he opened up his clenched fist to reveal an eye patch in his hand. This had caught Allen and pretty much everyone by surprise.

"I figured it might help draw attention away from your eye, seeing as how its black and you can hardly see out of it. And, a thing to remember me bye when you're gone…"

"Thank you Lavi. It will always make me think of you."

_So hold me when I'm here_

_Right me when I'm wrong_

_Hold me when I'm scared_

_And love me when I'm gone_

Allen moved closer to Lavi, trying to figure out how to hug him without hurting him. Lavi took the step and hugged Allen in return, tears running down his face as they embraced. Stepping back once the eye patch was placed inside a pocket on Allen's shirt, Lavi went back to standing back with the others.

_Everything I am and everything in me_

_Wants to be the one you wanted me to be_

He shared a few words with Krory, telling him that he shouldn't take on things when he didn't know what to do. And to not get into a game of poker without him being there to help out. Coming to Miranda, he told her to calm down and that not to worry that everything was going to be ok. Reever told him that they would keep his room ready for him if he was to return. Stopping in front of Kanda, both of them reluctantly said their goodbyes in the form of 'Beansprout' and 'Bakanda'

_I'll never let you down, even if I could_

_I'd give up everything, if only for your good_

_So hold me when I'm here, right me when I'm wrong_

_You can hold me when I'm scared, you won't always be there_

_So love me when I'm gone, love me when I'm gone_

Komui took off his beret and placed it over his heart, bowing his head down slightly. Allen smiled and turned to Lenalee. She had been unusually quiet during all this. Walking over to her, he noticed tears brimming her eyes as she tried to look away. Lifting his hands up to her eyes, he wiped away the stray tears that fell down her face. He gave her a small smile before turning away, thinking she didn't want to say anything.

_When your education x-ray cannot see under my skin_

_I won't tell you a damn thing that I could not tell my friends_

_And roaming through this darkness, I'm alive but I'm alone_

_Part of me is fighting this but part of me is gone_

She grabbed his left arm, causing him to turn around as she wrapped her arms around his neck, crying into his shoulder. Stunned at first, he rested his head on her shoulder, dipping his head forward as he tried to hug her back without his arms. Closing his eyes, tears slowly fell down his cheeks as well as the two cried into one another's embrace.

_So hold me when I'm here, right me when I'm wrong_

_Hold me when I'm scared and love me when I'm gone_

_Everything I am and everything in me _

_Wants to be the one you wanted me to be_

She had tell him her feelings now, tell him what he meant to her. She may never see him again and thought of not telling him was too much to bear. She had to know if he felt the same way. Lifting up her head from his shoulder, him doing the same with her, both looked into the other's eyes.

_I'll never let you down, even if I could_

_I'd give up everything if only for your good_

_So hold me when I'm here, right me when I'm wrong_

_You can hold me when I'm scared, you won't always be there_

_So love me when I'm gone_

"Allen…promise me you'll come back to the Order when this is straightened out. I don't think I can bear to loose you again."

"I promise I'll come back to you in the end."

_Maybe I'm just blind_

Before she had the courage to speak out her feelings, Allen leaned in closer to her face and kissed her. At first, Lenalee was surprised as he kissed her with closed eyes until she too closed her eyes and kissed him back. It was noted that while in this situation, and though it had been sad, Komui still presented his disapproval as the two exorcists kissed, Reever having to have to restrain Komui.

_So hold me when I'm here, right me when I'm wrong _

_Hold me when I'm scared and love me when I'm gone_

_Everything I am and everything in me_

_Wants to be the one you wanted me to be_

Breaking apart from the kiss, both exorcists leaned their foreheads against the others as they took in what had just transpired. A small blush could be seen on both of their faces. He had wanted her to know how he felt about her and knew that if he kissed her, she would know. And even though they didn't know how long it take for them to be together without all this madness, both were willing to wait for the other.

_I'll never let you down even if I could_

_I'd give up everything if only for your good_

_So hold me when I'm here, right me when I'm wrong_

_You can hold me when I'm scared, you won't always be there_

_So love me when I'm gone_

"I love you."

"I love you too."

Giving her a small smile that had been real in a long time, he felt a tug from around his neck, signaling that it was time to go. Running a hand down the side of her cheek, he turned back as he was once again, pulled away like the prisoner he was. Reluctantly being pushed into the carriage, he gave one last look at all of his friends before the door was cruelly shut in front of him. Lenalee watched the carriage pull away as it took away the one she loved.

Remembering that she had forgot to give Allen something to remember her; she pulled out a folded picture that had been taken of them with Lavi goofing around in the background. As she got ready to run, she was stopped as Komui laid a hand on her shoulder. Shaking his head to show that she shouldn't catch up to them, she turned back to the carriage as it dwindled away. Seeing that her brother wasn't about to let her go, her knees buckled under her and she fell to her knees. The picture fell out of her hands as they laid limply at her sides before they went up to cover her eyes as she cried. By now, the picture was caught up in a breeze as it was carried away by the wind. The carriage could no longer be seen in the distance.

_Love me when I'm gone, whoa_

_Love me when I'm gone, when I'm gone_

_When I'm gone, when I'm gone_

_Author's Note: Hey everyone, I want to thank all of the people who favorited this story and who reviewed. I love all of my loyal reviewers. I don't own the song When I'm Gone by Three Doors Down. Hopefully I'll be able to do the next chapter sometime next week, so keep your fingers cross. If any of you have song suggestions as well, I'll gladly put them into consideration. More Linkin Park songs will defiantly be in the fic though. I'm a huge Linkin Park fan, there my favorite band. Hope you enjoyed the chapter and please review._


	10. Nightmare into Dream

Ch. 10:Nightmare into Dream

Allen sat on a cushioned seat, plotting his form of escape. After having been rocked back and forth for about an hour, he was sick of it. He was not going to be locked up for the rest of his life. They weren't going to be of any help against the 14th. He was going to have to go through it alone. Or have what made him him die trying.

Taking an opportunity when one of the Crow members looked away, allen used all his strength to kick him away. This caused the two others and Link to turn in surprise. Activating his innocence and using all his strength to lift his arms up, dued to the darkmatter taking to affect, he broke the chain that had been connected to the collar around his neck. He would have to deal with the handcuffs later.

Kicking the other Crow into the other, he swerved to the side in order to dodge an oncoming blow from Link. Ramming his head into Link's, he proceeded to knee him in the gut, causing him to fall down. Pushing all his weight against the door, he managed to break it open. Falling out, he agiley landed onto his uninjured foot. It payed being a clown in a traveling circus. Standing up, he saw the carriage stop in it's tracks.

Bashing the chain that connected the bracelets together, he found that inaffective. Sensing one of the Crows about to strike, he quickly turned around, lifting up his handcuffs in an attempt to block the blade of the spear. That, thankfully, did the trick. Breaking both the spear and the chain, Allen reactivated his innonce and knocked out the Crow member. As the others came, he took them down with ease. They didn't look so tough now.

Punching Link in the face, he broke his nose, knocking him back down and out cold. Stopping when he realized that no one was going to get back up on their feet, Allen allowed himself to stand up from his stance and relaxed his muscles. Everyone was down, even Malcolm. Breathing heavily, he took in the smell of blood. He never realized the smell of it before. Its salty smell, the way it would taste like copper when it ran down your throat, how it was always so thick and sticky when you touched it. He wanted to see more of it, to hear their cries of pain, to taste their blood on his tongue....

His whole being froze in shock. He would've never thought about doing that before. He had never lusted to cause suffering and pain in others. The Noah in him was atarting to change him something he did not want to become. A monster.

Turning back to the carriage, he ran over and unhitched the horses, pulling himself up onto one. Grabbing the reins with his one free hand, he urged the horse forward into a run. He needed to get out of here before word was brought back to the Order. He needed to get as far away as he could. Before he did something he would surely regret.

*&*

Lenalee had locked herself inside Allen's room. Not caring about the crrent state of disarray, she laid in his bed, breathing in the last lingering scent of the missing exorcist. She had been in there for hors and wasn't planning on leaving anytime soon. She missed him so much, it hurt, and hadn't been gone for even a day.

Her innocence had been acting up, or in her case, feeling different. It was like it too was in despair, as if being away from the innocence of Allen's was the equivalent form of how it made her feel now that Allen was gone. Her heart cried out to him, searching for the one she loved. The one she wanted to be with. The one she hadn't been able to help.

She hadn't been able to give him the picture, in hopes that it keep them in his mind and saned. Now it was gone, and who knows how long it will be before she will see him again. Maybe that had been the last time and it was goodbye Allen.

Thinking like that only made the tears fall harder. She had to be optimistic. Besides, Allen wouldn't want her to cry. Wiping away the tears, she grabbed one of the pillows on the bed, placing it against her chest as she curled up around it, in an attempt to escape her troubles in forced sleep.

_Lenalee walking down a void of nothingness, not knowing what was up or what was down, or even where she was going. Something was directing her to some place, somewhere she had no idea where. Finally, she came across something her heart had been longing for. Allen Walker._

_He to looked like he had been wandering around just like her. But his movements looked sluggish as he walked around hunched over as he covered his face with a hand. Running up to him, she placed her hands on his shoulders, trying to grab his attention. He visible flinched and slowly looked up, his face scrunched up in pain and desperation._

_"Allen, how have you been? I know you haven't even been gone for a day but I still want to know_. _Allen?"_

_Allen shrugged her hands off his shoulders as he moved back, his face fearfull as he tried to move away from Lenalee. Falling to his knees, he now had both hands covering his face in an attempt to hide what was visible happening. His skin was turning gray, his white hair turning a dark metalic silver. Blood ran through the fingers that were covering his forehead. _

_Suddenly, all his struggling pain stopped as he landed on his hands as well. Breathing in heavily, he stayed in that position until he turned to look at Lenalee. Her eyes widened as she saw that his eyes were blank and lifeless, unending pools of white. His face held a grin that had become twisted and demented as it curved up into an unnatural way._

_Lenalee couldn't move, she was to afraid to. All she could do was stare back in horror as he got to his face and began moving to her. As he got closer, he began laughing menically, outstretching a hand that was heading for her throat. Closing her eyes, she hoped for the best, and waited for it to end quickly, tears running down her eyes, whispering._

_"Allen, I love you..."_

_As she waited to be killed,she suddenly felt aomething press against her back, feeling an arm shoot passed her body. Opening her eyes, she found herself staring back at a Noah Allen caught in the grasp of a gloved white hand. Relaxing slightly, she felt an arm wrap around her waist, pulling her closer to whoever was protecting her._

_Turning her head slightly to the side, she saw what her truly was searching for. The masquerade mask seemed to smile back at her when it caught her looking at him. Moving his head forward so that his chin rested on her shoulder. Turning her head back forward, she noticed the Noah Allen slowly start to fade away. _

_"I love you as well, Lenalee. That's why I would never let anything happen to you."_

_She turned around And wrapped her arms around his neck, or at least, the fur that was around his neck. Deactivating the innocence, causing it to change back into its dormat form, he wrapped his arms around her. They stood like that for a while before releasing the other in there embrace. The scenery had changed. Instead a blank void of nothingness, it had shanged into a wooded area, a lake a few feet in front of them, illuminated by the full moon._

_"Lenalee, I don't have much time. But I promise that I will visit you in your dreams."_

_"I don't want you to go."_

_"I have to go, I can't stay for much longer. Please, just wait for me."_

_"When will I be able to see you for real?"_

_"Not for a while. I need to get rid of the 14th first. I will be with you in the end, it hurts too much not to be with you."_

_"I'll be waiting, for you Allen."_

_"Thank you."_

_Placing her hand in one of his own, he bent down and kissed it like a gentlemen. Then he stood back up, her hand still in his, and kissed her like he had did when they had last seen themselves for real. That lasted for a little bit before they both pulled away simultaniously. Walking backwards, he continued looking at her as their arms were stretched to their furthest length possible. Giving her a small gentle smile, he let go of her hand and turned back and began walking away. As he retreated away, everyting around him started to fade the further away he got frome her. Last thing she remembered was seeing black._

Waking up, she sat straight up as she took in her dream. A smile graced her lips as she moved to to head for dinner, deciding that she shouldn't be depressed. Instead, she should be more positive and hope Allen would return soon. As she walked down the halls, she was aproached by Lavi, who looked like he was having trouble deciding if he should say something. This only got her more curious as to what was he trying to tell her.

"Lavi, what is it?"

"Lenalee, I don't know how to tell you this but, Komui just got a phone call back from Malcolm. Allen has escaped before he even made it back to their headquaters. He's gone."

Lenalee was at a disbelief. What had happened to thinking positively? She stepped back, not wanting to believe what he said.

"...No..."

She turned around and ran. She had to hear it from her brother. Maybe it was a trick to scare or maybe it was true. Her brothre wouldn't lie to her. Right?

_Author's Note: I know there are probabily mistakes here and there within the story and I apologize because of that. I'm not using the program I usually use so there's your answer. Thank you everyone who reviewed, it keeps me going. Please, tell me your thoughts/opinions of the story. Even if you hate it, I still would like to know. In case anyone was wondering, I'm a girl and 14 going on 15. Just a little something about me. Please review. _


	11. The Start of a Journey

Ch. 11: The Start of a Journey

Running into Komui's office, Lavi right behind her, Lenalee made her way towards her brother's office. Desperation was in her eyes as she asked him about what Lavi had told her earlier.

"Nii-san, tell me it's not true. Tell me Allen isn't really gone and hasn't escaped the Crows."

"I'm sorry Lenalee but it is. I've just gotten off the phone with Malcolm. He's threatened me to follow through with the plan that he was 'supposively' told by the Vatican. He has ordered us to kill Allen Walker on sight."

This had been new news to Lavi as he too looked back in both shock and disbelief. Allen wasn't evil, at least, not yet. Having to kill him while he was still an exorcist was going to be difficult, if not impossible. The slamming of the door signaled to everyone that someone had entered the room as well.

"As much as that sounds appealing, it would contradict some of my morals if I were to kill Beansprout while he was still Beansprout."

"I knew Yu-chan had a heart!"

"Don't push it Usagi."

"I think we're going to have to agree with Kanda on this one."

Now it was known that Krory and Miranda had joined the conversation as well.

"Allen has taught us all something, even if we didn't or don't realize it. He has taught me to not dwell on the past but to live in the present."

"…He taught me to…try my hardest and to never give up without a fight. I think we should…do the same for Allen."

"That's why I'm not going to do what the Vatican wants. Instead, I'll be sending Kanda, Krory, Miranda, and Lavi in search of him tonight. I'm not ordering you to kill him back to the Order. Should he prove resistance, you will set him right. If all else fails and he were to turn into the 14th, then we'll have no other choice but to destroy him. That is the best I can come up with."

"I'm going too nii-san! There's nothing you can do to change my mind!"

Komui was tired of being pushed around. He was the Chief for God's sake! Lenalee was going to have to listen to him this once and not follow her heart. Following her heart might end up getting her killed. Standing up quickly, he slammed his hands down against his cluttered desk as he made himself known.

"No!! You are staying here whether you like it or not."

"Why not? I can help bring Allen back here where he belongs."

"I don't want to lose you like we lost our parents. You're all I have left. You're the reason why I came to work at this God forsaken place. I love my dear sweet sister."

"I love you too nii-san but I also love Allen. Maybe even more. I have to help; I'll go crazy if I don't. Something about my innocence won't allow me to rest until I know Allen is safe. I have to do this!"

He could see the love in her eyes, the love that no longer belonged to him alone. The love in her eyes was for Allen. There was nothing else he could do to stop her. Her mind was already set and stoned. Even if he forced her to stay here, she would still manage to find a way to escape. All he could do was give in like any brother when dealing with an unrelenting younger sister.

"Alright, you can go. But if anything happens to you, any of you, I want you all to report straight back to the Order. Preparations are being made as we speak for your journey. I wish you all the best of luck and to bring Allen home."

Everyone gave a nod of understanding before departing to their rooms in order to pack any personal belongings. Komui sat at his desk, his hands covering his mouth as he rested his elbows down on his desk. Something from the conversation was troubling him deeply.

What had Lenalee meant when she had said that her innocence wouldn't allow her to rest until she knew Allen was safe? Could it be that she and Allen were connected in some way? That their bond was even stronger than the fact that they liked each other. Did their innocence have a connection?

He had remembered Lenalee telling him once she had regained her innocence during the invasion that, as it was forming, crosses seemed to tattoo into her legs as the innocence returned. They had only appeared briefly but she had said that they had resembled that of Allen's new cross that would appear every time he activated his innocence. And how could he forget that both had had their innocence save their life.

When Allen had had his heart pierced by one of Tyki Mikk's teezes, he had managed to stay alive, even when it had appeared that his innocence had been destroyed. Lenalee had almost been incinerated when she had pushed her innocence to its maximum power when she wasn't ready and had used the dark matter to weight her down, causing her to fall down at incredible speeds. A speed that would have surely burned her up if it weren't for her innocence. And in both cases, the innocence had managed to regenerate and change into a form more powerful than the last. What if the heart wasn't just one piece like the other recovered innocence?

*&*

Allen woke up from his slumber, finding himself having sprawled across the horse as it still trotted along. He didn't particular care where it was going, as long as it was going somewhere. His muscles felt tight and crapped, his broken arm acing and his ankle felt numb. He could feel the wounds on his back and arms open up and begin to bleed again from having kept his back strained and then switched to a somewhat laying position. He needed to find a proper medical center to have himself properly patched up. Whoever had recently bandaged him up didn't do a very good job at making sure it would last.

Judging by the fact that it was night, he must have been out for a couple of hours. Sitting back up straight, he felt and heard his stomach growl as it called out to be fed. He was starving! He hadn't realized how hungry he was until now and the fact that he hadn't eaten for a very long time only made him hungrier. Ok, now he to find some town that could bandage him up and get him food, but be able to leave like he was never there. That would be hard.

Wincing slightly from the pain in his back, he spurred the horse forward back into a run, going in one direction that he hoped would bring him to some small town. Hopefully he would get lucky. Just maybe.

*&*

All five exorcists stood in front of the Order, all looking out into the horizon, packs either swung across their shoulders or on their backs. No one knew just how long this would take or whether they would even find him. How do you look for someone who doesn't want to be found? And not knowing where someone like him would go was even harder seeing as how they didn't know where the starting and finish points were.

But they weren't going to give so easily, just like Miranda had said. Activating her innocence, Lenalee was the first to be off in there group, going as the lead. Signaling everyone else, they all went got into the carriage that they would use for transportation for now, following her as she headed in the direction of where the Crows had been going. Activating his innocence and enlarging it, Lavi took to the skies as well. He would have joined the others in the carriage as well but he needed sometime alone with his thoughts.

If Allen were to turn into the 14th, he would have to kill him. He didn't know if he could that. He would have to live with the guilt for the rest of his life, something he didn't want to go through. But he had promised him and he had to keep his promise. He would just have to wait for the time to come and not to fret about it. If he kept worrying about it, it would drive him insane.

*&*

As Allen's hope of finding a town slowly started to fade away, he found what he was looking for. Coming in on the town, he could see that it was old, the paint on them chipped and the weather worn from the environment. It seemed almost deserted.

Sliding down the right side of the horse, he limped over and grabbed the reins in his good hand as he made his way through the town. Looking at the different buildings, he could see doors almost ripped off from there frames, windows shattered. This place really was abandoned. It was now more like a ghost town.

Entering one of the buildings that resembled some kind of market, he limped across in search of anything that could be of some use. Opening up a cabinet, he found what looked like spider webs inside. Closing that without second thought, he proceeded to look some more around in search of something he could salvage.

Opening up a new set of cabinets, he found a loaf of bread. Greedily grabbing it in his hands, he ravenously ate it up as fast as humanly possible. Finding it stale didn't deter his appetite the leases bit. It only made him hungrier. Immerging out of the building, he went around back and found a well that hadn't completely dried up. Fishing out some water, he allowed it to slide down his parched throat, easing away the dry feeling that was in his mouth.

Walking into all the other buildings, all he found were scraps here and there. Although, he managed to find some gauze and bandages lying around collecting dust in a local doctor's office. Entering the last building he had not walked in, he looked around again. This time, he took note of what it was like. It had an older fell to it, pictures fallen to the floor, glass scattered around in the dust. Picking up one of the pictures, he looked down with saddened eyes. The picture was that of an elderly couple standing together, happiness clearly on their faces. They looked so good together; he wasn't surprised that they were married. The part that sadden him the most was the fact that they were probably dead due to the fact that nothing but dust and cob webs remained. The town was empty probably due to an akuma attack.

Wiping away a few fallen tears, his eyes caught sight of a cane resting against a wall. Placing the picture back down, he limped over and rested his left hand one it. It was surprisingly still smooth and glossy as if it was brand new. It was made into an ivory white, a carving of a crescent moon at the base. Testing it out by walking around, he found that it worked perfectly with his broken ankle.

Taking it with him, he walked back outside, the sun preparing to rise in an hour or so due to the position of the stars. Delicately patching himself up for now, he stuffed what was left of the remaining medical supplies into his pockets. Releasing the horse from its reins and saddle, he allowed to roam around free, finding no further use for it.

Walking it all the way to the other end of the small town, he stood there for a moment and watched as the sun began rising up from the horizon. As it roused in the sky, Allen began walking towards the direction of the sun. With cane in hand, he once again began moving forward. To where, he did not know. All he knew was that he was heading towards some city or town, stopping now and then. He would not stop until the 14th was gone. He would keep moving forward until the day he died.

_Author's Note: Alright another chapter done and ready to go. Thanks for all the reviews I've gotten for the last chapter, I really appreciated it. Please tell me your thought, opinions, even if you thought sucked. At first, I wasn't going to include Krory or Miranda much in this story but I've decided otherwise. Now the adventure truly begins. Please review._


	12. Something to Come

Ch. 12: Something to Come

Having walked for about a whole twelve hours with a few brakes along the way, Allen Walker continued heading east, passing two small towns along the way. Winning some desperately needed money in a few games of poker, he had bought himself a pack that had been filled with some provisions and had paid for a doctor to properly have his wounds checked and bandaged. With both his arm in a sling and his ankle bound tightly with gauze, he continued his slow limping pace onward until it had fallen night once again and was too tired and worn out to continue.

Taking ten minutes to gather wood, he created a small fire with another five minutes. Removing the pack from his back, he pulled some pieces of bread, an apple, and some meat that had been package. Taking some time to cook that, he ate the bread and the apple in a couple of bites. Waiting for it to look good enough to eat, he ate it without hesitating for the fact that it was still burning hot. Grabbing his canteen, he washed down his small meal with some water. Putting that aside, he was about to grab some more food when he stopped himself. He had to be rational. Who knows when the next time he'll come across a city or town?

Turning his temptation aside, he laid down on his back onto the grassy earth. He could feel the pain of the healing and most likely scarring tissue that had been burned on his right shoulder. After having it looked at properly, the doctor had concluded that a Chinese symbol had been imprinted onto his back. Not wanting to talk about what had happened to him that had caused him to get the symbol branded onto his back, the doctor gladly understood and told him what the symbol read. Forever Lost. Maybe that was true because he sure did feel lost. Maybe not in the since of actually being lost, even though he was, but in the since of himself being lost. He didn't know who he was anymore. Was he an exorcist or was he turning into he enemy?

With arms crossed behind his head, he looked up at the night sky, allowing the stars to ease his troubling mind. He thought about Lenalee, wondering if she was ok and if she missed him just as much as he missed her. It was hard, at first, to not go back to the Order after his big break but he had to resist the temptation. It became easier when he was miles away and did not know where he was. Hopefully when this was all over and the 14th was gone for good, they could truly be together.

Part of him loved that idea, dreamed of the idea but the other half knew it could never be. He was doomed to become the 14th whether he liked it or not and he would have to do everything in his power to give his friends just enough time to kill him. If he knew his friends as well as he thought he did, they were probably searching for him now. It would probably take them along time though, especially if they didn't have Timcampy with them.

His eyes began to sag until he allowed himself to drift off to sleep. Knowing that he might see Lenalee in his dream helped a lot. As he began losing consciousness, he heard the 14th say something that he couldn't quite make out.

"_You'll surrender to me very soon. Once that happens, we'll be able to set my plan into motion. You cannot escape me Allen Walker!"_

*&*

Lenalee sat a little ways from the group's fire. Digging into her pack, she pulled out a balled fist, opening it up to see a ballistic Timcampy flutter around her hastily until he relaxed slightly and rested on her shoulder. She had been glad to remember bringing him along for he surely would be big help in finding Allen. She stared out into the night, looking up at the stars.

She sat there for a moment until she noticed Kanda's presence sitting by her. Turning her body to face him, she waited patiently for him to speak. Having had his eyes closed, he opened one eye to show that he knew that she was looking at him.

"What?"

"Is there any particular reason why you're over here?"

"I'm trying to meditate. It's kind of hard to do when you've got a lot of people talking to you. Over here is quieter. Why?"

"Good, cause I don't need you asking me if I'm ok. I've been asked that too much already."

"What made you think I was going to ask that?"

The remark had caught Lenalee by surprise. Turning to look the other way, she bowed her head in an attempt to hide her embarrassed face. Smirking for a second, Kanda closed his eye once again.

"Now if you don't mind, I'm trying to meditate here."

Deciding that she would be tempted to strike a conversation with an unresponsive Kanda, she moved a little further away from both him and their camp. Unrolling the blanket she had packed, she spread it on the earth and laid down across it. Laying on her side, she decided she might as well go to sleep so that she would be able to get an early start in the morning. She hadn't realized how exhausted she was from having to fly most of the way until she had closed her eyes. Knowing that she might see Allen in her dreams made her all the more eager to relinquish her hold to sleep.

*&*

_Walking through a dense forest, Allen stumbled across a violin that had been simply abandoned. What a violin was doing in his dream, he had no clue. Picking it up, he continued moving through the forest until he emerged from the very same spot he had seen Lenalee last, finding her not there. _

_Deciding to wait for her, he eyed the violin in his hands before positioning it into that of a musician that was use to playing the instrument. A sudden urge came over him as he began to play the violin, as if he had known to do it for years. As he got into it, he closed his eyes and allowed his hands to play the music on there own. At first, he did not know what he was playing until one of the notes triggered a remembrance. _

_It was the 14__th__'s song. Wanting to drop the violin right then and there, he found himself not allowing himself to. Not until the song was finished._

_*&*_

_Lenalee ran through the extremely dense forest, her ease not at rest due to the claustrophobic feeling the trees were giving her. Stopping to look at where she was, she had an uncanny feeling that she was being watched. Closing her eyes she stood there lost and beginning to feel the affects of being afraid._

_Suddenly, she could here the faint sound of music playing. It sounded like a cello or a violin. Where there was music, there would surely be Allen. Following the sound of the song, she finally managed to emerge into the clearing that accompanied the lake. There Allen stood with his eyes closed and his face holding a look of peace as he played an unknown song on a violin in front of Lenalee._

_Sitting down on the ground, she watched him play the instrument with precision and care. Watching him play was one of the most interesting thing she had ever seen. Once he had stopped playing, he brought his hands down to his sides as he turned to look at Lenalee with a smile on her face, finally aware that she was there._

"_That was beautiful. What was it?"_

"_It…it was the 14__th__'s song. It sort of came over me when I began playing the violin."_

"_Where did you find it?"  
_

"_I found it on my over hear in the woods, just lying there. Some sudden urge had compelled me to take it. I guess the Musician wasn't only a master with the piano."_

_Placing the violin back on the ground, he walked over to her and sat beside her. They sat there in comforting silence as they looked out at the glimmering lake. Moving closer to him, placed her head on his shoulder, him resting his head on her head. _

"_We're all looking for you Allen."_

"_I figured you would by now, it's just that, I need some time to sort this out. I don't want to hurt any of you."_

"_I understand but you can't keep running from your troubles. It will only cause you more pain."  
_

"_I know but I'd rather have the pain inflicted on me rather than my friends. I can feel the Noah inside of me continue to creep around as if I'm walking down dark halls alone, waiting to jump out at me. It's not something I like feeling…"_

_Seeing the look of sadness and pain in his eyes, she decided that it was best to change the subject._

"_I've miss you."_

"_I've miss you too. I miss you so much that it hurts."_

"_I know the feeling."_

_Stroking her hair with his hand, he closed his eyes and took in her sweet scent. He was enjoying every minute of this and wouldn't have stopped it for the world if it weren't for the fact that he was going to wake up sooner or later. A signal ringing in his head told him that he was going to wake up soon. What had felt like minutes must have been hours in the real world. If only it could be the other way around. Kissing her on the cheek, both got up and embraced before going separate ways as they disappeared from the dream world and into the waking world._

*&*

Waking up reluctantly, Lenalee found everyone else still out cold as the sun started its assent in the sky. The breeze brushing her hair around, she watched Timcampy flutter around her head before moving to the others, brushing his tail across their noses. Upon reaching Lavi, he was snatched by his tail and pulled down into his arms in a crushing hug as he went back to sleep, murmuring something along the lines of 'five more minutes'. Timcampy was going crazy as he struggled to get free from Lavi's hold.

Finding no other choice, Timcampy bit down hard into the flesh of one of Lavi's arms. Jolting him awake, Lavi immediately relinquished his hold around Timcampy and began nursing his bleeding arm. The sight of it all had made Lenalee laugh. She hadn't had a good laugh in a long time and she was glad to find that would still be some comic within there group even in these troubling times.

Noticing her laughing at him, Lavi gave her a pout, causing her to laugh even harder. Not being able to help himself, he began laughing along with her, rolling on the ground in his excitement. Getting up in front of the carriage and grabbing hold of the reins in his hands, Kanda scowled down at the scene as his annoyance was beginning to rise.

"Are you two just going to sit there laughing all day or are you going to join us. We've got to keep moving. If you don't hurry up, I'm going to leave you two and head back to the Order."

This made them shut up as Lavi scrambled into the carriage with his thing jumbled around in his arms. Lenalee let out a few remaining giggles before telling Timcampy to find Allen and watched him speed away. Jumping into the sky, she eagerly followed behind him, Kanda guiding the horses after her. With any luck, he would lead them to Allen.

*&*

Allen woke up bright and early and began his continuance walking throughout the better half of the morning and afternoon. His walking had led him to one of the coasts. Deciding which way to start walking, he decided to walk to the right until he came upon a dock with a boat. Finding no one around, he took it upon himself to take the boat with no questions asked.

Hopping into the boat, he easily untied it from the dock and began rowing his way across the ocean as he set off for the nearest country, Belgium.

_Author's Note: Alright I kind of felt bad when I didn't update the day I intended to, seeing as how my internet was down, so I thought I'd do a double update to make it up to you all. No need to thank me, I figured it was my duty seeing as how I've always managed to update so quickly. Hope this is fast enough for you xdevil-childx. Please review is pretty much all I have left to say._


	13. Bring me back

Ch. 13: Bring me back

After having walked for weeks, Allen had finally made it out of Belgium, making his way into Germany. Having walked without much rest, he decided to set up a small camp along the banks of the Rhine River for a week or two. Going through Belgium had allowed him more opportunities to replenish supplies and earn some more money, spending all the currency earned in Belgium. He was set for a couple of weeks. Not much relaxation had been found there so there had been no need to stay for long.

Unrolling his only blanket onto the ground, he expertly created a roaring fire and laid his pack down to the side as he walked over to the shore of the river. Even though he had plenty of food to last him awhile, albeit if he was rational about it, he still thought it would be nice to try fishing for once. Crafting a poor excuse for a fishing rod, he tossed the line back swung it forward, not getting very far. Sitting for a couple of minutes, he easily and quickly gave up his attempt by throwing the whole stick back into the water, causing the water to splash up into his face.

Wiping away the excess water, he looked down at his reflection within the water. His wounds had all but healed by now, the exception being the puffed up scar that was now on his back from being burned on his back right shoulder. His ankle and broken arm had mended as well, causing no further need for the cane that he still carried around anyways. His hair was starting to grow steadily longer than his normally nicely kept short hair. His clothes were starting to get warned out, causing him to have a dirty look to him. Luckily, he had just enough spare money from Belgium to have bought himself some new clothes. It paid being able to cheat in a game like Poker, especially being able to deceive the other gamblers with his innocent looks.

But something was different in his reflection. Instead of both silver eyes staring back at him, his right eye had seemed to turn lifeless, a void of unending dull silver. Then the color started changing colors, stopping at an equally just as dull copper, as if it was on its way of turning gold. His reflection seemed to take a life of its own as it stared right back at him and began laughing. Starting as a small chuckle, it escalated into a booming laughter as his skin in the water started taking a grayer tone to it, his hair becoming wavy and light silver, both eyes now gold.

Stepping back away from his reflection, he picked up a stone and tossed it not the river, distilling the water. Getting onto his hands and knees, he crawled over to the river again in hopes to find his reflection back to normal. All had reverted back to normal with the exception of one thing. His right eye was still he endless void of dull copper. Placing a hand over the eye, he stood back up and walked over to his pack and began digging hastily inside of it.

Coming upon what he had been searching for, he pulled out the eye patch that Lavi had given to him. Looking down at it solemnly, he slowly placed it around his head, finally putting it into use. Positioning it over his right eye, he let out a sigh of relief for having something to hide his eye for now. He did not know how long it would be of help before the same thing were to happen to his other eye.

Pulling out the extra clothes, he walked back to the river, stripping on his way. Getting into the water, he quickly cleaned himself off with the water of the river. Staying in there for only a couple of minutes, he got out and put on the new pants he had gotten, leaving his shirt aside for now. Moving back to his fire, he sat down as he discarded his old clothes into the fire, allowing the heat of the fire to dry him off faster.

As night slowly began peaking over the horizon, Allen began preparing a decent size meal for himself. By now, he had been hungry all the time but had to control himself and make sure he didn't eat all the food he had packed that would last him for weeks in one night. With the lack of his usual diet, he was now somewhat thinner, sparring the necessary energy that he used up when he activated his innocence, seeing as how he wasn't refueling it as much.

Going back once again to the river as some of the meat hung over the fire as it was being prepared, he scooped up some water from the river into his canteen, something in the water caught his eye. Straining his eyes onto the location, he moved over to the near by elevated land that stood by the water and by the thing. Crouching down, he brought his left hand down into the water, catching the thing that had caught his eye before it had been pulled away by the slow current. Pulling his hand back out, he opened his closed hand to see what he had caught.

Looking down at his catch made his heart lurch. As he looked back down at it, he slowly closed his hand over it as he brought it over his heart. His head by now had been bent forward bent down even further, his body trembling. No matter how hard he was trying, he couldn't help but release his sobs as tears began streaming down his face, his body now shaking. In his hands was a picture. A torn and water logged picture of him and Lenalee with Lavi in the background being a goofball.

How long had it traveled before it had amazingly made it to him by some twist of fate? He had missed her so much, not having been able to see her in her dreams like he said he would. There was no one he could stay with long enough to not fear for their safety. But, he was still lonely. And he put that onto himself for the well being of his friends and Lenalee. He needed someone to blame.

"…Damn you…damn you Mana…"

It had been his fault! He had never loved him for who he was. He had loved him because, in his delusion, he had been seen as his little brother. He was the one to blame. If it weren't for him, his life wouldn't be like this at all. Things would be much different. He had not been the man he had thought he was. He was some man that had been stuck in the past. Him and his brother's fault.

A roar of maniacal laughter echoed around his head. Clutching his head, he bent forward, collapsing to the side as he tried to ignore the pain. The picture was still in his grasp, now being plastered against his head.

"_Blame him all you want, it won't change the fact that you'll turn into me. My hold on you is slowly getting stronger as yours is slowly loosing its grip on reality. This is driving you crazy and unless you see your little bitch Lenalee, you'll go insane. She is the key to becoming myself again and fulfilling my plans."_

"She's…she's not a bitch! Tell me your plans."

"_Why should I care anyways, you'll know them soon enough. I plan to eradicate all akuma, all Noah, all exorcists, and the Earl himself. That way, this world will be cleanse from all that has tainted it. And I'm going to start it by killing Lenalee. There's nothing you can do to change the fact that your turning into me, your whole existence disappearing into me!"_

Allen gritted his teeth, his eyes closed shut as he withered in pain. This had been the most pain caused onto him by the 14th. It was like some buzzing noise was pounding the inside of his head, trying to become free. His body felt like an electric current was pulsing through him. The 14th was coming into control.

*&*

Lenalee and the group had made it into Germany after following the reports of some people having seen him a long the way. They were close to the Rhine River and something inside of Lenalee was telling her that he was close by. But something else was also telling her that something was wrong.

Everyone was exhausted but not willing to give up. As they made to the Rhine River, they stumbled across some small made up camp. As the others began looking around, she watched as Timcampy began flying of a little ways to the right. Following him, he had led him to someone shirtless, slowly getting to their feet. Her heart skipped a beat. It was Allen. But something was wrong.

_How can you see into my eyes_

_Like open doors_

_Leading you down to my core_

_Where I become so numb_

His only revealing eye was a shining dull copper, his hair wavy as the silver shined in the moon light. His skin was of a darker tone, blending into the dark background. His eyes were lifeless as they stared at her dumbly, all traces of the lively Allen gone. No, not now.

_Without a soul_

_My spirit sleeping somewhere cold_

_Until you find it there and lead_

_It back…home_

Without hesitation, Allen, shot forward, heading towards Lenalee. Her shock had caused her to freeze in her spot. Luckily, Krory had followed her and had also witnessed the new look to Allen. Jumping in front of her, he quickly blocked the attack by crossing his arms over his chest. Now both were trading punches at the other as they did their dance of combat.

_Wake me up_

_(Wake me up inside)_

_I can't wake up_

_(Wake me up inside)_

_Save me_

_(Call my name and save me from the dark)_

_Wake me up_

_(Bid my blood to run)_

_I can't wake up_

_(Before I come undone)_

_Save me_

_(Save me from the nothing I've become)_

By now, Kanda had joined the fight as well. Lavi and Miranda were with Lenalee as she watched the three of them try to kill each other. Was this it for Allen? Had they all been to late to save him? No, she wouldn't give up. She had to try.

_Now that I know what I'm without_

_You can't just leave me _

_Breathe into me and make me real_

_Bring me to life_

Allen was in there somewhere. And she was going to bring him back. Getting back to her feet from having her knees buckle under her, she calmly walked forward. She took nothing into account as she walked her way over to Allen, all fear gone. Hopefully her plan would work.

_Wake me up _

_(Wake me up inside)_

_I can't wake up _

_(Wake me up inside)_

_Save me_

_(Call my name and save me from the dark)_

_Wake me up_

_(Wake me up inside)  
I can't wake up_

_(Wake me up inside)  
Save me _

_(Save me from the nothing I've become)_

_I've been living a lie_

_There's nothing inside_

_Bring me to life_

As Allen was about to strike Krory in the face, Lenalee got in between them, stopping the fight. Allen had froze on the spot. His fist was still drawn back ready to punch but something was causing him not to. His face contorted was him and the 14th were going at a mental struggle.

_Frozen inside without your touch_

_Without you love, darling_

_Only you are the life among the dead_

Falling to his knees, clutching his head, Lenalee got down to his level. As she watched him, she slowly wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer to her. Tears were running down her face as he started changing back into the Allen she knew.

_All this time, I can't believe I couldn't see_

_Kept in the dark but you're right there in front of me_

_I've been sleeping a thousand years it seems_

_Got to open my eyes to everything_

_Without a thought, without a voice, without a soul_

_Don't let me die here_

_There must be something more_

_Bring me to life_

The other exorcists were looking at her in amazement. She had been the only one to bring him back to reality. Maybe he was cured and would go back with them. They were wrong. Struggling out of her hold, he scooted backwards as he stared in horror at the thought of what he could of done. He had been lucky. But his luck wouldn't last forever.

_Wake me up _

_(Wake me up inside)_

_I can't wake up_

_(Wake me up inside)_

_Save me _

_(Call my name and save me from the dark)_

_Wake me up_

_(Wake me up inside)_

_I can't wake up_

_(Wake me up inside)_

_Save me_

_(Save me from the nothing I've become)_

Scrabbling to his feet, he quickly grabbed his shirt and pack before running away like last time, not even giving a chance to look back. All of them were stunned as they watched him slowly put distance between them. He had to get away again, he couldn't let them be around him even for a minute. He was doomed to live a life of loneliness until everything was situated. He could have killed Lenalee if it weren't for the fact that he was resisting with all his strength.

Lenalee couldn't get herself to run after him. She was still in shock and denial that he would run away from her. And by now he was gone, running away from them all. Lavi looked to her before resting a hand on her shoulder. She was in so much pain, he could feel it. Maybe Allen was in just as much pain as well, which had caused him to run, even leaving what appeared to be a cooking meal. They would just have to start up again in the morning and hopefully the set of events would be different.

_I've been living a lie_

_There's nothing inside_

_Bring me to life_

_Author's Note: I don't own Bring me to life by Evanescence. Please review._


	14. Gone for Now

Ch. 14: Gone for Now

Allen was still running. He had been running for all night and most of the morning. He had left his shoes behind, along with some of his other things that weren't important anymore, so his feet were now bleeding. Having to run on rough terrain and to do it without shoes would do that to someone's feet. And even though there was quite some distance between him and his friends, he still couldn't allow himself to slip up and relax. Relaxing from this point on was not an option.

His legs were getting tired and his feet could give in any minute now. Stepping on a rock that he had failed to noticed, he fell forward and tumbled down the declining hill he had been on. Falling felt like forever as his body was thrown this way and that, finally coming to a stop with the help of a tree. In this case, the tree knocking him out cold.

*&*

Lenalee sat by the dimming fire, having been unable to fall of sleep in the very same camp Allen himself had used briefly. Her eyes were blank and seemed like an unending void of sadness as she stared into the depths of the remaining fire. Tears still litered her face from the continous crying she had been put through. Some part of her was mad that Allen had ran away once again from them all, most of all, from her. But soemthing else was telling her that he had came close to killing her and if it weren't for the fact that he himself had put up a good fight in the end, next time could be her death.

Still, she missed him a lot. They had not seen the other for about a week in the others dreams and that was worrying her. And they had just been so close but he had been so far away, the 14th having began to take control. Now he was gone and who knows when the next time they would see each other. Hopefully it wouldn't be each others funerals.

Wiping her face away of the tears, she got up and began walking for some fresh air. Walking around the edges of the camp, she looked up at the sky, staring up at the clouds. Then something in the distance grabbed her attention. Looking at the area of the noise, a small glimmer hope that it was Allen filled her for moment as she waited to see whoever or whatever it was. But her hope sunk when she realized that it was a group of akuma instead of Allen.

Activating her dark boots, she ran back to camp, frantically wake them up with just enough time to activate their innocences before they were through into the fray of a battle. It was of a group of level twos and a level three. Lenalee took it upon herself to be the one to take that one down. Using rapid kicks, she quickly destroyed the akuma as if it were nothing, freeing its tormented soul.

Shrinking his hammer back down to a smaller size, Lavi leaned on it slightly as he pondered on something.

"Akuma have been showing up less frequantly than normal lately. Maybe the Earl has something big planned and he needs all the akuma that he has for it."

"It's nothing we need to dwell on for now. Right now, we need to go back to searching for Allen."

"Yeah you're right. We can worry about that later. Lenalee, what do you think?"

Lavi and Krory turned to see Lenalee looking off to the distance. She was staring out to the distance in the general direction that Allen had ran away in. Something inside of her, her innocence, could feel Allen's presence miles and miles away; his very essence was dimming. Like a candle, it started to flicker before it slowly began fading away.

He wasn't dead, that much she knew. She could still feel his innocence but not the exorcist. But before the moments extinguish of his presence, there had been a burst of energy that fought back in an attempt to gain control once again. It held up for a little before futilely being overpowered and discarded. Allen was gone.

Her eyes widened in shock as they filled in with even more despair than thought possible, her innocence acting up as the color on the anklets turning to a deep blue instead of the normal red. It took everything in her power to not slump to her knees from the sudden change. The one she loved was gone. No, she wasn't going to accept that, there had to be a way to bring back Allen and rid him of the 14th once and for all. She'll die trying if she had to.

"Lenalee?...Lenalee!"

She was running as fast as she could, her innocence not being able to activate to its usual standards. She didn't care if they came with her, but they weren't stopping her either. She had to find him and return him home, where he belonged. Lavi was quick to follow her, not wanting her to go alone as everyone else quickly gathered there things and followed as well.

*&*

_Allen was walking through a void of nothingness. All around him was endless white as he became nervous with the unusual silence, causing him to panic and run. Finally some sound came into this endless void but one that was driving him crazy. The 14th's laughter._

_"Allen...thank you for finally slipping up. I've been waiting paciently and in the end, I'm getting what I wanted. It was nice knowing you. Good bye Allen Walker."_

_The song of the 14th came on full blast in all directions, being played by a multitude of instruments all playing together. The sudden blast of noise had made him stumble and fall, hands covering his ears. He stayed like that before he started to struggle and ignore the music he knew so well_. _He tried immersing himself with the memories of his friends, trying to replay them in his head so that he would stay sane but it wasn't working. The multitude of the music only increased as it brought him out of his memories and back into the void. He clamped his ears shut with his hands, closing his eyes and clinching his teeth as he laid on his side. _

_There was nothing else he could do but give in. Curling himself into a ball, he allowed his fate to be sealed. He had no control anymore. He had losed. It was all over._

*&*

Getting to his hands and knees, he stretched his shoulders around, cracking his neck. Once satisfied, he got onto his feet and stretched some more as he looked down at his feet, the wounds healing from the once many blisters. Looking down at his left arm, he allowed himself to grin as he activated his arm. The colors were inverted to white and black instead of black and white.

His skin took a light grey tone to it, still not completely his Noah self yet. Looking down at his clothes, he showed signs of disapproval as he snapped his fingers and changed his outfit. Now he was in a dashing suit with a checkard tie and top hat. Removing the eye patch, he tossed it aside as he loosely tied back his almost shoulder length wavy hair.

Noticing the slight buldge in one of the pockets in his pants, he dug through it until he came across the object of his search. It was the picture of Allen and Lenalee. With his grin furthering on his face, he took the top end within his hands and tore it right down the middle. Discarding them to the side, he began walking away leisurely towards his attended destination.

"I'm coming for you, Earl. I best be prepared if I were you. I'm unstoppable with the body of Allen Walker!"

Once he was gone, all that remained that anyone was ever there was the ownerless pack up on the hill and the torn up pieces of the picture with the eye patch laying right in between them. A few rain drops could be seen slide down the glossy material of the photograph. The heavens began to cry.

_Author's Note: I know there are probably spelling errors in this so I apologize. In my honest opinion, I thought this chapter kind of sucked but I'll leave it up to you to decide. Please review._


	15. Beginning to Snow

Ch. 15: Beginning to Snow

After about another month's searching for Allen, the Black Order had given up the search for him. They had tried everything they could, went everywhere they could think of where he might be but he was gone. It was like he had vanished out of thin air. And as much as they hated to admit it, maybe it was better off if they stopped searching for now. But Lenalee was a different story.

She had refused to give up and continue the search of she had to by herself. On a multitude of times, Komui had to drug her in order for her to calm down and if that didn't work, he'd have no other choice but to restrain her. He hated having to have to that but she could very easily hurt someone or even herself. And he couldn't help but hold some resentment towards Allen and the 14th.

If it weren't for the fact that Allen was the type of person to burden himself with the troubles of others and himself and the fact that he would kill Lenalee when he fully became the 14th, he wouldn't have cared as much. But through out his time staying here, Allen Walker had been a pleasure to have around. His always polite nature had led him to believe that nothing would happen between him and his dear sweet Lenalee. He had been wrong on that one.

The Vatican was now taking over the primerary search as the exorcists from the Order took a moments break. Most of them had gotten to know Allen and weren't ready to kill him in cold blood. Even if he was rumored to be apart of the enemy now. The last of Allen's where abouts had been when just a couple days after he had ran from the others by Lavi. He reported that he didn't notice that he was there and that he was different.

But that had been the last the had seen of Allen. They weren't sure where he was or where he was going. Or even if he was still Allen anymore. All they could do was hope for his return as Allen and not the 14th and maybe, just maybe, God was on Allen's side.

*&*

Komui walked down the dark hall ways, sipping his coffee now and then as he made his rounds. Akuma activity was rather low than usual. No one was complaining at the moment though. Everyone had a lot on there mind due to the recent events and an akuma attack now would destroy them.

As he passed a window, he paused when something caught his eye. Walking over to the window, he looked closer again and found that it was beginning to snow ever so slightly. That was odd. Especially sense it had just turned December 1st today and it didn't normally snow until late December to early January. He let out a sigh at the things a certain day would possible bring up.

Allen had told them that he didn't remember what day he had been born but when Mana had adopted him, he had chose to give Allen December 25th as his birthday, the day he had been adopted. So it was decided that they would celebrate his birthday on Christmas as well. But there probably wasn't any point now seeing as how it was very unlikely that Allen would be back in time for his own birthday. Pity.

Taking another sip of his coffee, he decided to go check up on Lenalee again. Ever since she had gotten back, he would check up on her now and again to make sure she was alright. Walking into her room, he quietly stood by the partially open door and watched her. She was sound asleep after hours of trying to get out of her restraints that had been needed today.

She had attempted to leave the Black Order to go look for Allen. When he had shot her a sedative, they learned the hard way that it wasn't working on her at the moment. Krory had reluctantly knocked her out long enough to have her restrained. He felt like a monster for having to do this to his own sister but it was for her safety.

Moving towards her bed, he grabbed one of the many blankets that were on her bed and tucked her in as best he could with it. It was getting kind of chilly so it was better if she slept with a blanket on her. Smiling down at her, he placed a gentle kiss to her forehead.

"Please forgive me Lenaleee."

He stood there for a moment before he felt it was best he leave. Quietly exiting, he went back to making his rounds and sipping his coffee. Retreating further within the shadows, once he was out of sight, Lavi moved out of the shadows and into the moonlight as he watched Komui's receding form.

Upon hearing a knock on the window pane, Lavi turned to see Timcampy fluttering around outside. Opening the window he allowed Tim in as the snow still continued to fall lightly. Tim fluttered around Lavi's head a couple of times before landing on his shoulder.

"What do you have today Timcampy?"

As he was addressed the question, Timcampy opened his mouth as he projected the memories he was attending to show Lavi. As they flashed against a wall, Lavi watched patiently at the video. It was of some Asian region with a slightly gray toned Allen walking steadily to his unknown destination. By now, his hair looked to be somewhat longer than the last time he had seen any of Tim's memories that he had sent him to collect. He was spinning the top hat he always wore on his left index finger while humming some random tone. His eyes were closed as he continued to walk without fear of running into anything.

The memory ended with the crossing of some buildings. Lavi knew the style. Allen was somewhere in China and probably heading to where he thought he was going. Allen was on his way to the Noah's previous base in Edo, Japan. He must know something they didn't if he was going back there. Butthat was all the evidence he needed.

Releasing Tim once again outside, he watched him fly away until he was nothing more than something gold glittering in the distance. Shifting back into the shadows, he stood there in thought as he pondered at what should be done next.

No one was going to go to China now willingly. And he wasn't about to tell the Crows his little information. Instead, he thought of a better idea. Himself and Lenalee would go tonight. He wasn't Bookmen's apprentice at the moment so there was nothing at stake for him and he was pretty sure Lenalee was tired of having ot stay here against her will.

Walking into her room, he stealthily walked over to her bed and began unfastening the restraints on her arms and legs. Half way through it, Lenalee was beginning to stir and when she had woken up and was about to say something, Lavi had to quickly cover her mouth with his hand in order to stiffle her speech. Removing his hand once he was sure she wouldn't speak again, he finished unfastening the remaining restraints, he moved over to her desk and grabbed a piece of paper and began writing something on it.

When he was finished, he lefted it on her desk and walked over to Lenalee as she sat in her bed staring at Lavi.

"What are you doing Lavi?"

"I was writing a note and now we're going to China."

"Why?"

"Because that's where Allen is at the moment. I think I know where he is heading."

Lenalee asked no further questions as she silently agreed to go with him. Opening her only window, Lavi sat perched as he grabbed his hammer before jumping off. Once outside, he enlarge his hammer and began extending it as he sat on the handle. Lenalee watched him go for a moment before perching herself on her window sill before she too jumped out.

She allowed herself to free fall for a moment before attempting to activate her innocence. At first, it wouldn't work until her desparation had caused it to activate once again. Now shooting forward, both exorcists flew through the sprinkling snow falling skies as they heard to China.

_Author's Note:This is to make up for the not so good chapter from before. I know ther are probably spelling mistakes so you don't need to tell me. Please review._


	16. Going to a Family Reunion

Ch. 16: Going to a Family Reunion

The 14th continued his steady walking as he twirled his top hat on the tips of his first two fingers. Whistling a little tune to help past the time, he continued his walking with closes eyes, not having any fear of running into something. A cool breeze was blowing as it brushed pasted blades of grass and ruffled the white and pink leaves; birds joined in with the 14th's whistling with their singing. Everything around him was music to him, all following the same beat of the song he was humming.

A smile was on his face as he listened to the things around him carry on the music. If only things could always be this perfect all the time. Instead, it had to be tainted by the Earl, his precious akuma, and the exorcists. All have claimed to be working for the hand of God, carrying out his wishes. But both sides had failed to notice those who were caught in between the two sides of the raging war. The humans.

They were part of this world as well and deserved a chance of peace. And he was going to give it to them. He would fulfill their wish by ridding the world of its akuma, its exorcists, and the Earl himself. It was a far out wish but one he had high hopes of being fulfilled.

Coming across a medium sized lake, he breathed in some the refreshing air before walking to the shore of the lake. He watched as some kids played a little ways from the bank in the water. It was of two boys, brothers maybe, as they splashed each other. When the younger of the two seemed to slip and fall head first into the water, the older one was quick to pull him back to the surface, patting his back as he coughed up some of the water he had swallowed. Asking the younger if he was ok, he replied with something the 14th could not catch but whatever it was, it had made the older boy laugh.

Watching the two of them had brought back some fond memories of back when he had been a younger brother to Mana. Smiling at the scene, he sat down in the grass, and tossed his hat into the air. As it flipped in the air, it came back down in the form of a guitar as it landed gently to the ground. Placing it in his lap, he positioned it so that he could play it and began playing it.

The music had grabbed the two boys attentions as the came clambering out of the water to hear it better. They stood transfixed as they listened to the music continue, increasing in multitude every now and then. As the song drew to a close, the melody died downed into a softer tone before it ended completely. Looking back up, he noticed the two kids clapping in applause.

"That was good mister."

"Yeah. Where did you learn to play like that?"

"Oh...from here and there over the years. It takes a lot of practice. But I'm glad you enjoyed it."

"Do you travel around playing music?"

"Sort of...I'm actually on my way to Japan to see if my family is there. I've been looking for them for a while now. Would you two happen to know where the nearest dock is?"

"Yeah, it's just a couple miles from here. There's usually at least one ship at dock."

"Thank you. Your help was gladly appreciated."

Getting to his feet, he placed a hand on the older boy's shoulder and then ruffling the younger boy's hair as he walked past. With guitar in one hand, he began walking in the direction the two boys had pointed to.

"Wait...I can have my dad take you to the docks if you want. Its a long walk from here."

"No no, I don't need to burden you or your family. I'll be fine. Thank you anyways."

As they watched him go, he lifted his guitar up and the boys watched in amazement as the shape change it's form. Cocking his head to the side, he gave them a wink before he went back to looking forward and began playing the violin now in his hands. They could here the delicate notes of the violin as the volume slowly decreased the further away he was from them. They continued to stare wide eyed until he was too far for them to see anymore.

*&*

Coming to the docks close to midnight, the 14th, by now, had his top hat back on his head in place of the violin he had been playing earlier. Scanning the docks, he found a sailor still tending to his ship in the late hours. Walking up to the ship, the 14th waited patiently until he was noticed.

"How can I help you?"

"If it's not too much trouble I would like to go to Edo, Japan."

"It's kind of late to be going around in a ship now."

"Oh...ok...then would it be alright if you could take me in the morning."

"Ofcourse, it be no trouble at all. Do you have a place to stay for the night?"

"I'm afraid not."

"Then I'll be glad to have you as my guest. Just give me a moment I'll show you to my house."

"Thank you. You're too kind."

"Don't worry about it. How can I leave a young man such as yourself sleep out in the cold. I'm all done here so we can get going now."

Jumping down onto the dock from his ship, he took a minute to collect himself before he led the way to a small house just beyond the dock on a nearby hill. The walk taking only a ten minutes, the older man should him to a spare room in the back before bidding him good night. Nodding, he entered his room and laid on the bed in an attempt to get some sleep. He found it not to be too hard as he drifted of to sleep rather quickly.

*&*

Sleeping had felt like minutes as the first rays of the sun woke him up by shining into his face. Quietly exiting the room and the house upon finding it empty, he walked back to the dock to find the middle aged man preparing his ship to be ready to set out.

"So you're awake. I didn't want to wake you up and have you just sit there and wait while I get things ready."

"You didn't have to do that, I'm more than willing to help you if you like."

"No, I would never let myself ask a guest to help. Besides, these old bones still have some kick left in them and I'm almost done."

True to his word, he had finished just minutes later, laying a plank down to help him board the ship. Minutes later, they were leaving the dock as the wind began propelling the ship forward. The 14th looked out into the sea, trying to control all the excitement that was filling inside him. As the middle aged man, Tseung being his name, piloted the ship with years of experiance. Once they were in open water, Tseung looked down to see him leaning on the rail pearing out at the sea.

"If you don't mind me asking, why are you heading to Edo?"

"I'm having a little family reunion."

_Author's Note: Please Review._


	17. Apocalyptic Nightmare

Ch. 17: Apocalyptic Nightmare

"What?! What do you mean she's gone?!!"

"It says it here in this note. You might want to read it."

Section Leader Reever handed Chief Komui the note that had been left in Lenalee's room. Judging by the handwriting, it had been written by Lavi.

_Dear Komui,_

_By the time you read this, I and Lenalee will have already been on our way to China. I have reason to believe that Allen is there and is on his way to Edo, Japan. I also have reason to believe that the Noah side in Allen has taken over. We are on our way to bring him back and to the way he was before all this madness happened. I'm not sure how long it will take us or if we'll even come back. If something happens, I'll make sure to send Lenalee back here._

_-Lavi_

_P.S: Don't worry! I'll make sure Lenalee stays safe. You have my word._

Komui looked back up from the letter as he rubbed his temples. So they had found a way to leave and to look for Allen once again. It was only a matter of time before they had left once again. Nothing was going to deter their chances of finding Allen and bringing him home.

"What would you like us to do sir?"

"…send some exorcists to join them. We know where they're going."

*&*

Lavi and Lenalee sat in a train compartment as they both watched the scenery pass by. They had been traveling by train for a couple of days now, having had to change trains in the process. The sun was setting, creating a line of light across the horizon as it began being sucked down into the ground.

Both had shared little conversation with the other, finding the silence a small comfort. It gave them time to themselves, thinking about things that didn't have to do with the events. In Lavi's case, he thought about all the things he would have to do to Allen for making them worry so much. He couldn't help but snigger inwardly at the thought of Allen doing some of the things he was coming up with. Like watching Allen struggle as he tried to put some order within his and Bookmen's room. That would probably take a life time.

Lenalee thought about all the things they could have done before all this happened. Like possibly dates or something equally just as romantic. Seeing his smiling face in her head and then the image of his face slowly fading away made her inwardly shutter. Deciding that it would probably best to get a little rest, she laid down on the cushioned seats she had been sitting on as they faced directly in front of Lavi, using one of the blankets in there to wrap herself up as she laid with her back to Lavi. Staring at the cushioned seat in front of her only helped but slowly drifting her to sleep out of boredom of staring at a plain thing for far to long.

*&*

_She sat on the remains of the Order, her face cupped in her hands. Her shoulder length hair was being brushed around by the soundless wind, pieces of debris small enough to be carried by the wind floating past her. All was quiet, no sound coming from anything in this apocalyptic nightmare. The nightmare that hadn't plagued her dreams in a while now. Why start again now?_

_Looking up from her hands, she allowed them to fold across her knees as they were pressed against her chest. Tears sparkled in her eyes as they brimmed the surface, waiting for something to trigger the response to cry. Scanning the area she knew sadly all to well, she looked at the fallen remains that littered the ground as it stuck out of the body of water it had fallen in. No one else was there, not even to dead corpses of the ones she cared about. She didn't know if that should relive her or frighten her more. _

_A black crescent moon hung above her overhead. It's reflection in the water was just the opposite. In the water it was a normal white color. The sky held an almost crimson color to it, no clouds blessing the sky with its presence. All the more to further dramatize the apocalyptic setting._

_Moving her hands over her ears in order to make since with the soundless world she was in, she looked around hastily as the world seemed to be spinning, crashing into her. Her eyes were already watering further, a tear falling down her face. Something down below had caught her eye. Turning her head downward, she noticed the surface of the lake ripple from some unknown cause. This was something that never happened._

_Jumping down to the surface of the lake, gracefully standing on the water without any problems. Looking back down at the ripples, she tried desperately to find what was causing it. Then an arm came swiftly out of the water, grabbing a hold of her leg and then pulling her down. The hold on her leg had caught her by surprise before she started struggling and managed to break free. Then she heard some laughter._

_Looking back up as she slowly ascended, she looked back in shock at a deranged looking Allen. He hid part of his face with a hand in an attempt to stifle his laughter. His eyes were distorted in madness, the Noah's dark side showing in him. His wavy grey hair was tossed and pulled in the wind, it almost half way to his shoulders. Stigmata ran across his forehead, his skin now an unusual grey._

"_All exorcists must come to an end. And you'll be the first to go."_

_Jumping down at her from the perch he had been standing on, he had once again caught her by surprise as he wrapped his arms around her. The combined weight and force of Allen had caused her to fall back down to the lake. As she plunged down into the water, Allen wouldn't relax his hold around her the slightest as both began to sink. She was struggling for air as water filled her lungs, Allen showing no signs of any problems as he soundlessly laughed back down at her. _

_Her vision began to blur as the lack of oxygen was finally catching up with her brain. As the distance to the surface began seem so distant, she slowly closed her eyes. The last image she saw was the continuously laughing and demented face of Allen._

*&*

She immediately jumped up, falling to floor in her sudden jerk awake. Sweat covered her face as she stared frightenly at her surroundings as they slowly brought her back to reality. Lavi was quick to jump to her side as he held her by her shoulders.

"Lenalee it's ok. It was just a dream. You were having a nightmare."

She looked at him as her face scrunched up as she struggled to not cry. Finding that no use, she wrapped her arms around him as she began crying onto his chest. This had caught him off guard as he kept his arms in the same position they had been when he had been holding her by the shoulders. He looked back down at her stunned for a moment before hesitantly wrapping his arms around her.

Resting his chin on her head, he allowed her to cling onto him. She had needed someone to hold her as she cried and finding that Allen wasn't there, he was her substitute instead. He didn't mind, at least he was being of some help for now. But even that wasn't much. If he only knew what it was like to witness the things she did in some of her dreams. Maybe he would finally be able to understand.

*&*

The 14th jumped off the ship and onto the shore, straightening his hat in the process so it wouldn't fall off. Turning to face the ship, he gave Tseung a smile as he waved the man goodbye.

"Thank you Tseung. I don't know what I'd do without your help."

"It was no problem um…"

"Allen…Allen Walker."

"It was no problem Allen Walker. I hope you get to see your family again. Take care of yourself."

"Don't worry, I will. Have a safe journey back home Tseung."

"Thanks Allen, I will."

The ship began sailing away, the 14th still smiling a generous smile before it twisted into one of insanity, covering a hand over his face in attempt to shield it. Regaining his composure, he turned in the direction of the headquarters to the Millennium Earl and his other children. He had gone through the memories of Allen before he had taken control, learning that they had fought there before. Knowing that could mean that the Earl might not even be there. But moving couldn't be done in one day. And maybe one of the Noahs that the unfortunate pleasure of having to stay behind for the time being would be there. They would tell him where the Earl was. Even if he had to kill it out of them.

_Author's Note: Please Review. I have nothing else to say. Thank you everyone that reviewed last time._


	18. Black Knight vs White Knight

Ch. 18: Black Knight vs. White Knight

Tyki Mikk sat lazily at the table that had been used when all the Noah and the Earl would dine together. The Earl had left him with the task of making sure no one came and took anything and to take care of any stray exorcists that were foolish enough to go there. None the less, he was still bored out of his mind. That would change very soon.

Playing solitaire with a deck of cards, he lazily placed the cards into its proper place. After having played this 50 times straight, things tend to get a little dull. Deciding to take a break from his boredom, he got up from his chair, running his hand through his hair as he smoothed it back. Digging inside his pockets, he produced a bright red apple.

Biting into it, he continued walking down the empty hallways, his footsteps echoing off the walls. Halfway through his apple, he froze in mid-bite from astonishment at seeing the one person he wasn't in the mood of seeing ever again standing all the way on the other side of the hall. It was Allen Walker. And the air surrounding him was different as the torches flickered for a moment before turning blue.

"Card shark?!"

"Hello Tyki. How are you today?"

"Um…"

"Where's the Earl?"

"What?"

"Where's the Earl?"

"Why would I tell you! Last time I checked, we left on bad terms. So quit acting like you're my friend."

Now Tyki was gasping for breath as his wind pipe was being restricted by a hand wrapped around his throat. His mind hadn't completely registered the fact that he was being choked by someone who had been on the other end of the hall until he couldn't feel the ground from underneath his feet and the hold from around his throat tightened. The pressure of it caused him to forget all about his apple as it fell limply to the ground; he begrudgingly looked down at the impassive Allen.

"We use to be friends Tyki. Very close friends. And it pains me that I'll have to kill you if you don't answer my question. I'll ask you one more time. Where is the Millennium Earl?"

"Bite me."

The 14th disguising as Allen threw Tyki to the side with enough force to send him flying through the wall. Walking over to the crumpled heap that was Tyki and the broken wall, he waited for Tyki to get back up. Concluding that he wasn't getting up anytime soon, he turned his back to the destruction before he brought his left hand behind his back. Keeping it there for a moment, he brought his hand back forward and stared down at his clenched fist. Opening his hand, he couldn't help but smirk at the teez in his hand as it struggled to hold onto its life. But sadly, its life was ended short as the 14th crushed it by clenching his fist.

Turning to face the now standing Tyki, he let his grin further widen as he saw him use a teez to make his stigmata looking shield on his arm. He was somewhat dusty, having had to wipe his face with his hands to clean it. Straightening up, he cracked his neck before getting into a stance that showed he was ready to fight. The 14th removed his top hat and transformed it into a violin, much to Tyki's amazement, playing the 14th's song on it.

"I think this will help jog your memory."

As he continued to play, Allen's straight hair became wavy and a silver grey, his skin taking on a greyer tone to it. His eyes had been closed but once they had opened after he had finished the song, they revealed to him that they were now golden instead of silver. Tossing it to the side, he cracked his knuckles before attacking the still stunned Tyki. He barely had enough time to block before they were both barreled through the wreckage as they immerged into the next room.

"It can't be?!"

"Oh but it is."

Both of them were wrestling one another before both got back onto their feet. They immediately rushed each other, Tyki bringing forward his right hand ready to punch while the 14th did the same with his left. As fist collided with fist, a blinding flash erupted around them. Once it finally died down, both could be seen with their backs having been slammed hard against the walls behind him, the forth of the energy being used to punch the other having propelled them backwards. But that didn't stop them.

They were quick to get to their feet once again, Tyki sending a horde of teezes at the 14th while he dodged them. Being occupied with dodging the butterflies, he was too distracted to notice Tyki coming in for another attack. Making contact with his chest, it had no trouble sinking into him as it narrowly missed his heart. Kicking him to free his hand, the 14th was sent flying up, slamming into the ceiling before falling limply to the ground.

Wiping his hands free of the dirt and dust the clotted his gloves, he was about to be on his way before he say the 14th get back onto his legs out of the corner of his eyes. Once he blinked, the 14th was already in front of him as he grabbed him by the scruff of his shirt and flinging him to the side like he was nothing. Before he had time to recover himself, the 14th had pounced at him, causing him to have to stay lying on the cracked tile. The 14th was punching the crap out of Tyki, still demanding to know where the Earl was. Now Tyki was really pissed.

Taping into his hidden power, he let his anger and rage consume him as his dark side completely consumed him. Dark matter began accumulating around him as it fueled his strength, expelling the 14th off of him. With the 14th now sprawled on the floor, he looked up when a shadow loomed over him. Standing in front of him was an armorized version of Tyki as his face stayed hidden behind the helmet and face plate, an aura of dark matter surrounding him.

Grabbing him by the neck, he squeezed and squeezed until he was turning blue before slamming back down hard on the ground. Bringing his foot down hard on his chest, the 14th coughed up blood, feeling some of his bones crack from the pressure before they mended themselves somewhat. Then Tyki grabbed a hold of the checkered tie around the 14th's neck, he lifted him up slightly off the ground, causing it to strangle him. He stood like that for a moment before swinging him to yet another wall.

Slamming into the wall, Tyki was upon him again as he wrapped his arms around his midriff and began running through the walls with the 14th struggling to get free from the iron hold. Passing through about six walls, Tyki's momentum began slowing down before he stopped and kicked the 14th straight forward. Dust from the rubble hazed the battle ground as Tyki stood there impassively waiting for the 14th to even dare him into fighting once again.

As the haze cleared, Tyki found the 14th still standing with his shoulders sagging, his head bowed down, and most of his shirt torn to pieces. He was breathing heavily as he looked back up at Tyki, wiping away the blood running down his chin.

"Where'd you learn moves like that Tyki? I don't remember you ever having been able to do that. I guess the Earl truly wanted you to be like me."

The 14th was struggling to keep standing as he began tapping into the power that slept within him. A white aura began surrounding him as he drew it in for power. Grabbing his left wrist within his hand, he began bringing forth the sword of exorcism.

"Innocence…ACTIVATE!"

Another blinding flash came as it consumed the entire area. As it dimmed down, the 14th stood before Tyki with a similar helmet that covered the eyes and left the mouth. Only his took on the form of a jester's mask, one half having black outlining and the other half having delicate designs on it. A glass frame covered his left eye, the only thing allowing him to see. Crosses hung loosely from the ears of the jester like helmet. A furred collar wrapped around his neck, his right arm covered in the white fabric with fur wrapped around his wrist, hand gloved. The thing most distinguishable were the grey wings that sprouted from his back, the one on his left covering up the fact that he was missing his left arm since the sword of exorcism was out.

A white aura continued to surround him, clashing against the black aura that surrounded Tyki. As they both stared at one another, the eye piece of the 14th's mask began glowing a bright gold. That cued them to begin their battle once again as the 14th held the sword of exorcism back ready to strike and Tyki enlarging his teez shield.

Clashing with each other, both began struggling to over power the other, trying to gain control over the situation. Tyki's shield was beginning to crack under the added pressure of the sword, causing the 14th to use greater force. Further cracking, 14th brought back his sword and swung it with the right amount of force to both break the shield and send Tyki flying.

Now outside, the 14th looked down at Tyki as his power began dimming back down as he reverted back to his usual Noah form. Hovering over him, the wings on his back beating soundlessly as they kept him afloat. Tyki had his eyes clamped shut as he waited to be killed. Finding nothing was happening, he reluctantly looked up to see the 14th now standing in front of him.

"You tell the Earl that I'm looking for him."

Tyki nodded before he escaped by summoning on of Road's doors that would lead him to where the Earl was. The 14th stood there for a moment before dismissing all the power, falling to his knees from exhaustion. Using the power that still laided dormant in him used a lot of energy on his part, him still not his full Noah self yet.

Walking back into the mostly ruined remains of what was once the Earl's base, the 14th found a desolate spot to rest and allow his wounds to slowly and painfully heal. He was very tired so he allowed himself the much needed and greatly appreciated rest as he laid with his back against one of the undamaged walls. He would need his strength back if he were to fight the Earl, the exorcists, and the other Noah. It was only in a matter of time before he got his wish.

_Author's Note: I used the general basics when coming up with the design for the 14__th__'s armor based on Tyki's. I got the idea of having wings when I read somewhere that sometimes the 14__th__ is seen with wings whenever he talks to Allen or something like that. I have a drawing of it and I'll hopefully scan it onto the computer to show you sooner or later. Please review._


	19. Struggle

Ch. 19: Struggle

Lavi and Lenalee got off the train and exited the station, this taking them no more than five minutes since they were traveling light. They had gotten off somewhere in China, near one of the coasts that could easily get them to Japan. Both were glad to be rid of the train, it having taken them almost a week and a half to reach their current location. Fresh air was just what they needed to help clear their troubled minds.

But being so close to making it to Edo, fear couldn't help but creep into Lavi as he remembered the promise he had had no idea he was making for Allen. Fighting and killing was one thing but fighting and killing your best friend was another. He wasn't sure if could do it, if he could take the life of Allen.

It was yet another duty he was forced to do and one he was equally as reluctant to do. It would always come back to him to haunt him in his dreams till the day he died. Something he wasn't planning on experiencing. A reassuring squeeze from his hand brought him back to reality.

Noticing the way he had looked downcast, Lenalee gently took his hand into hers and gave it a gentle squeeze. This had got his attention as he looked down into her violet eyes. He gave her a brimming smile as a response, easing away the worry in her face.

"Let's run."

"What?"

"I think we should run."

"Why?"

"To get our blood pumping. I don't know about you but staying in that confiding train compartment made my muscles stiff."

"Lavi, I don't think that's such a good idea."

"Nonsense, it'll be fun."

He didn't give her time to answer before he was tugging her along behind him as he began running. The sudden jerk and pull of her arm had almost caused her to trip as she lost her footing for a moment. Finding that he wasn't going to stop anytime soon, she reluctantly began running as well. Noticing that she was willing to follow now, he let go of her hand and began running faster and harder.

Now both friends were running side by side, each trying to beat the other in a race. Wanting to be fair, she raced him without the use of her innocence even though she was still beating him by a couple of inches. They ran to the docks that would hopefully bring them to Allen.

*&*

"Excuse me sir, I was wondering if you could maybe help us."

Lenalee stood in front of the closes ship, her hand around the collar of Lavi's shirt, having had to drag him the rest of the way when he had passed out from exhaustion.

"That depends on what you need help with."

"We need a ship to take us to Edo, Japan. Would you be able to take us?"

"We'll if that's all you're asking then of course I'll be glad to help you two out. I just took another young gentle man over there not three days ago."

"Really? What did he look like?"

"Oh he was a fellow no older than yourself. He was wearing some pretty nice clothes you ask me. And he was very kind and willing to pay for the ride but I couldn't take money from someone who was on his way to see some of his family or something like that."

"Did he have white hair?"

"Yes he did, oddly enough. And a strange looking scar with a star above his eye. I believe it was on his left eye if I'm not mistaken. Why do you ask?"

"Well you see, he's my…my boyfriend…and we were looking for him. Will you take us to the spot you dropped him off?"

"Your boyfriend….aw! How cute!!!"

"Um…sir…will you?"

"Oh…sorry…of coarse. Will go right now if you'd prefer."

"Yes, thank you very much."

The man dropped the plank to alone them aboard, Lenalee still having to have to drag Lavi on board. They were quick to set out, heading for the same place he had dropped off Allen. They were on his trail and hopefully they would make it to him before he disappeared once again. Folding her arms over the hand rails lining the ship, she leaned forward as she rested her head on her arms, looking out into the distance.

*&*

_Allen could feel the control the 14__th__ have over him slacken after feeling him use a great amount of energy that clearly hadn't been ready to use yet. As he groggily stirred, he looked around as the multitude of the music had lessen somewhat, finding himself suspended on a cross in mid air. He could feel the tight restraints of chains around his wrist, the rusty substance chafing his skin as he tried moving around._

_I can't escape this hell_

_So many times I've tried_

_But I'm still caged inside_

_Somebody get me through this nightmare_

_I can't control myself_

_He felt very tired for some reason, all his muscles worn out, and the feel of unmarked wounds all over his body. Whatever the 14__th__ had been doing, it had used a lot of energy on his part as well. Then he could feel the presence of the 14__th__ as he walked into the scene, calmly looking at the chained up Allen._

_So what if you can see the darkest side of me_

_No one will ever change this animal I have become_

_Help me believe it's not the real me_

_Somebody help me tame this animal!_

_This animal, this animal_

_All the visible wounds that covered his Noah counterpart showed until they disappeared as they healed over only, they didn't go away per say. No instead, they went to Allen in a minor form. Upon realizing this, Allen let his eyes widen as he howled out in pain, blood slowly dripping to the ground as it resembled the sound of a faucet not turned completely off._

_I can't escape myself_

_So many times I've lied_

_But there's still rage inside_

_Somebody get me through this nightmare_

_I can't control myself_

_As Allen gritted his teeth back in pain, the 14__th__ began laughing at him. Walking up to him, he bent his head forward so that it was directly in front of his ear._

"_If this keeps up, all the injuries this body sustains that I can't heal will go to you. And that, in the end, will kill you. Have fun."_

_So what if you can see the darkest side of me_

_No one will ever change this animal I have become_

_Help me believe it's not the real me_

_Somebody help me tame this animal I have become_

_Allen gritted his teeth harder, struggling to hold back the snarl that wanted to show itself. Finding it too hard to resist, he snapped his head forward, snarling like a trapped animal in a cage would at its tormentor. Immediately he felt a tight pressure wrap around his neck, restricting his wind pipe. _

_This animal, this animal_

_This animal, this animal_

_This animal, this animal_

_This animal_

_Bringing his head back, the new chain that was now around his neck relaxed, allowing air to now flow through his lungs once again. Coughing slightly, he allowed himself to create no further outburst in fear of something else happening to him. The 14__th__ smiled at his obedience through pain before walking away._

_So what if you can see the darkest side of me_

_No one will ever change this animal I have become_

_Help me believe it's not the real me _

_Somebody help me tame this animal I have become_

_When the 14__th__ was gone, he let his eyes look around hopelessly as they began to droop. He wanted to go to sleep but was afraid he'd never wake up again. But what was the point anymore. He was going to get killed in the end anyway, so why should he fight to stay awake. Why should he hold on to the little sanity that he had left? For one person. Lenalee._

_Help me believe it's not the real me_

_Somebody help me tame this animal!_

_This animal I have become_

*&*

The Earl sat in one of his newly made throne, knitting away at some scarfs for his Noah children. As he knitted away, Tyki slowly made his way out of the shadows and into the view of the Earl. He was a little hesitant to tell the Earl what he was threatened to do but the Earl was one step ahead of him.

"What is it Tyki?"

"Um…well…someone has requested to see you."

"Really…what's the lucky fellow's name?"

"It's…it's the 14th Lord Millennium…he's back."

As he waited for the Earl to lash out in hatred, all he got back were some chuckling. Looking slowly up from his bowed head, he could see that something was surely amusing him.

"What's so funny?"

"Oh…it's just that…that annoying bastard managed to actually come back. But that will be ended quickly. Tyki, go fetch me Lero. I'm going on a little trip. It won't take me long."

Tyki watched the Earl get up out of his seat, walking away at a steady pace as he caught Lero in his hand as he flew to him. For some reason, Tyki was very afraid for what would happen to the 14th.

_Author's Note: Please review. I don't own the song Animal I've Become by Three Days Grace._


	20. First Showdown

Ch. 20: First Showdown

The 14th walked through the remains of the once inhabited base of the Earl. His strength had finally returned to him, after a full day's rest. It was only a matter of time before the Earl came and they would begin their dance of death. The score had to be settled once and for all.

Crushing some pebbles with the added weight of his foot, he stopped in his tracks when he heard one of the still standing doors open behind him. Turning around, he stood face to face with the Millennium Earl. The ever present grin on his face failed to falter as the 14th smiled back as well, just as equally as demented.

"So, I hear you've been looking for me."

"Indeed I have. You caused me a lot of trouble you know."

"That's what I do."

The 14th smiled even more before he activated his left arm and began attacking the Earl, who in turn had now brought out his sword. Both were stuck at a standstill, sparks flying as they added pressure to the attacks. Finding himself on the losing end, the 14th began jumping and dodging the swings set at him by the Earl. If it weren't for the acrobatic skills that Allen had possessed, he'd already have multiple cuts by now.

_Here I stand_

_Helpless and left for dead_

Throwing all his weight backwards, the 14th allowed himself to slam against a wall, only to propel himself forward by pushing himself from the wall with his feet. He came in at an incredible speed, the Earl bringing up his sword to block just in time. Grabbing hold of the blade of the sword with both hands, the 14th began leaning backwards, adding more weight to he sword in attempt to unbalanced the Earl. As blood ran down his hands, his tact finally paid off as the Earl was beginning to lose his balance; now pulling down with all his might, he finally toppled the Earl down. Now on his back, he used his strong legs to kick the Earl over his head, sending slamming through a wall.

_Close your eyes_

_So many days go by_

_Easier to find what's wrong_

_Harder to find what's right_

Flipping back onto his feet, he left no room of hesitance as he charged at the spot where the Earl had been knocked at. With the uplifted dust from the remaining wall, the 14th wasn't sure where the Earl was until he felt the blade sink down into his right shoulder. Quickly jumping back, he held his left hand over the wound as he waited for what he could heal to heal. The remaining result was that of a minor cut before that too disappeared, only to reappear on the real Allen. Looking back up, he continued his dance of dodge as he moved away from the blows given by the Earl.

_I believe in you, I can show you_

_That I can see right through all your empty lies_

_I won't stay long in this world so wrong_

"Why are you holding back? I can see in your eyes that you're just dying to get rid of me. So go ahead. Let's fight this like equals shall we."

"I was only trying to have some courtesy but if you insist then we shall."

Grabbing hold of his left wrist with his right hand, the 14th slowly transformed his arm into the sword of exorcism. Once Allen's innocence was fully activated, he launched in for another attack head on. Now both blades were clashing and sending sparks, the vibrations that sounded off the two metals as they made contact became the battle music that egged them on. The 14th would have used his full power as well but that was only for a limited time and that would use up too much energy in the long run.

_Say goodbye_

_As we dance with the Devil tonight_

_Don't you dare look him in the eye_

_As we dance with the Devil tonight_

Catching the 14th's blind spot, the Earl swung his sword around, turned it so that when he hit him it was like a paddle and then slammed at his side, sending him flying through the wall in the same fashion the 14th had did to the Earl. Laying in the rubble as a crumpled heap, the Earl stretched his hand out toward the 14th, the masquerade mask of Allen's protected it's supposed master from harm as the Earl wrapped his hand over the 14th's face. Lifting him up off the ground, the Earl began charging up some dark matter to propel him to the sky.

_Trembling_

_Crawling across my skin_

_Feeling your cold dead eyes_

_Stealing the life of mine_

Now charged up to a strong level, the Earl released it all upon the Noah Allen's face, succeeding in sending flying upward to the sky. The masquerade mask had protected him from most of the damage but the energy had far exceeded the capacity of the mask protecting as it shattered from the strain of energy. The remaining energy exploded in his face, causing great damage to his right eye. Slamming into the ceiling, he fell harshly to the ground, clutching his right eye as he squirmed around in pain.

_I believe in you, I can show you_

_That I can see right through all you empty lies_

_I won't stay long in this world so wrong_

He stayed like that for a moment before he slowly got to his feet, removing his hands from his eye as he revealed all the cuts and bruises now gone but not being able to heal the fact that he was now blind in that one eye. To bad for Allen. As that too slowly faded away, the 14th could hear the other self inside him scream and howl in pain as the blind eye was now transferring to him instead. Calling back the sword of exorcism and got into a battle stance, the stance slightly faltered for a moment before he redoubled it to assure the both of them that he was still in this fight.

_Say goodbye_

_As we dance with the Devil tonight_

_Don't you dare look him in the eye_

_As we dance with the Devil tonight_

"Looks like you're getting tired there. Why don't I finish this quickly."

"I'm not going down without fight."

"Suit yourself."

Both of them clashed at each other once again. As both of them were in their stalemate, the 14th was building up some power to release back at the Earl. Once it was sufficient enough, the 14th released it all as it came in the form of a blinding flash. Slowly dying down, it was noted that both the Earl and the 14th were standing in front of each other unmoving. Staring at each other, both stayed like that until they both simultaneously fell forward. Now it was a race to see who would recover first.

_Hold on, hold on_

The Earl was the first to stir as he struggled to get onto his hands and knees first before daring to try to get back on his feet. The 14th then quickly followed him as he too tried getting up on his hands and knees. Both sides were jerking terrible as their arms and legs were protesting against the fact that they wanted to get up. As they slowly got onto their feet, the 14th almost collapsing right then and there, both turned their heads to the direction of incoming footsteps.

_Say goodbye_

_As we dance with the Devil tonight_

_Don't you dare look him in the eye_

_As we dance with the Devil tonight_

Seeing that it was two exorcists that were on the way, the Earl simply laughed as the 14th looked back at him with an intense fierceness. Stepping back slowly, the Earl continued to laugh as one of Road's doors appeared behind him. No, this wasn't going to happen. The Earl was not going to escape him one more time!

_Hold on, hold on_

"I think I'll let these kind exorcists finish you off."

"NO!!!"

As the 14th struggled to run after him, the Earl had already gone through the door and before he could reach it in time, the door closed and disappeared. Gritting his teeth in anger, he turned to face the stunned Lavi and Lenalee as they stared into the pits of loathing within the golden eyes.

"…exorcists…."

_Goodbye_

_Author's Note: I don't own Dance with the Devil tonight by Breaking Benjamin. Please review. The story has reach it's ultimate climax._


	21. Final Showdown

Ch. 21: Final Showdown 

The 14th stared at them menacingly before he disappeared in a flash. Looking around, Lavi froze when he found out that the 14th was standing behind Lenalee, who was still oblivious to the fact. Seeing the look of horror in his eyes and the reflection of the 14th in his eyes, she quickly turned around, kicking him in the process. He came to skidding stop as he resisted the pull the kick had been placed upon him.

"Curse you exorcists! You just cost me my one chance to bring down the Earl once and for all. For that you must DIE!"

He ran after Lenalee, Lavi jumping in front of her and bringing his hammer down with great force as it connected with the Noah Allen's left arm. Both were striking each other with just enough force that could have crushed any normal arm or hammer. But they weren't ordinary as they continued without hinting at any chance of stopping.

Lenalee stood to the side as she watched them continue to clash against each other. She didn't want to attack Allen unless she absolutely had to. She didn't want to hurt the one she loved.

With sparks flying, the 14th began trying to dodge the swings being swung at him as both would never get out of the stalemate they had been in. Once a safe distance away, Lavi brought out his seals, calling forth his flamed serpent. As the seal formed underneath the 14th, he had no where to run as the fiery serpent surrounded him as it spiraled above him. Looking up in frustration, the flamed beast came crashing down in a flurry of flames.

The intensity of the flames radiated for a moment before it slowly began dying down as it slowly extinguished itself. Walking up to the still very hot atmosphere where the flames once burned, he waited patiently for the smoke to clear out.

"Please forgive me Allen."

As the smoke finally cleared, shock showed in his face as he stared at the still standing form of the 14th. Burns laced around his legs as they were the only thing that was left unprotected as the rest of his cloak and hood wrapped around him tightly. His shoulders were sagging, his head bowed down as it looked like he was struggling to keep standing. Bringing down his hood, he wiped away all the sweat that had been brought on by the heat as he looked back up at Lavi. Within a blink of the eye, the 14th was standing in front of him, whispering something in his ear.

"Allen sends his regards to the person that just burned his legs."

Lavi was too surprised to respond as the 14th grabbed him by his scarf and flung him into an extremely cracked pillar. Ramming into it, the whole structure collapsed over him as he was slightly buried in the rubble. Losing his hammer as it got caught under some of the fallen stone, Lavi slowly looked up as he stared back in horror as he waited for the 14th to bring Allen's sword of exorcism crashing down. He closed his eyes, not wanting to see when the 14th was going to kill, rather wanting to know when he felt it.

We waited with closed eyes until nothing was happening. Slowly opening his eyes, he was faced with the back of Kanda as he struggled to hold his own as his sword and Allen's sword were blocking each other. Relief washed over Lavi as today wasn't his time to go.

"Am I glad to see you Yu!"

"Shut up Usagi. I'm trying to concentrate on saving your sorry hid!"

Lavi felt a sudden tugging on his arm as he was pulled to his feet and out of the rubble. Turning his head, he was greeted with the presence of Krory as he bent down to retrieve Lavi's hammer.

"I think you'll be needing this."

"Thanks Kro-chan, I owe you one."

"I believe you owe Kanda one as well."

"I owe Kanda a lot of things. Why start now?"

Both exorcists laughed before they too joined the fight in an attempt to help Kanda out, not that he really needed help in the first place. Seeing that there was no use avoiding it, Lenalee too jumped into the fight as she went to help her friends. Miranda stood on the side lines as she activated her Time Record.

Noticing this, the 14th back flipped out of the attacks and jumped in front of Miranda. She was full of fear as he dropped his sword in order to grab her wrist. Bringing it to the Time Record, he began adding pressure to it as he squeezed the weapon within his hand. As it began to crack, the effect it had extinguish as it stopped its ability to turn back time and heal her friends. That was when he let go, quickly dodging the oncoming blows as Miranda stared down in horror at the state of her innocence, the weapon not having a complete form. One down, four to go.

Calling forth his sword once more, he brought up his sword to block Kanda's sword and Lavi's hammer, both beginning to overpower him with the combined strength. Krory came in and delivered a punch to his exposed armless side, sending a wave of pain through the still some what tender area. This infuriated him as he leaned all his weight against both Kanda's and Lavi's weapons as that lifted him up and off the ground. As he was getting ready to balance on top of his sword, he wrapped his legs around Krory, using a backbend to fling him to the other side of the room. Two down, three to go.

With that accomplished, the 14th front flipped in the air before landing nimbly on his feet. Spinning on the balls of his feet, he swung his sword harshly down at Kanda's, kicking Lavi and Lenalee away as he fought the samurai one on one. With both clashing and slicing at the other, they kept on weaving in and out of the others moves as they did the dance of battle. As the 14th feigned a move, Kanda went to block before he realized it was a trick and by then it was too late. The sword of exorcism proceeded to slice the front of his chest from his right shoulder all the way down to his left thigh.

Kanda stood star struck as his sword fell out of his limp fingers, falling harshly to the ground. Smirking at his defeat, he kicked him back to where Krory had been tossed. Three down, two to go.

Lavi gritting his teeth in anger as he brought forth his seals once again, this time summoning his iron and thunder serpent. As the bellowing beast came charging at the 14th, he simply lifted up his blade as if he were blocking something that would be physically able to prevent coming. Once the serpent crashed into him, he was amazed with what he was seeing.

The serpent was being sliced in half as if it were nothing but butter. As the elemental serpent was being brought down, Lenalee clinched her fists, her mind finally deciding what she must do. As much as it pained her to have to do it, she had to fight the 14th, even if it meant killing Allen in the process.

Hovering slightly over the ground, she came charging at the 14th from behind while he was still a little preoccupied. But that had been what he was expecting. Pivoting on his feet, he pointed his sword at her as she came swooping down. By then it was too late to stop.

"Lenalee!!!"

Lurching forward, she coughed up a huge amount of blood as she felt a throbbing pain down at her abdomen. Slowly looking down, her mind slowly registered the fact that a sword was piercing through her midsection, blood streaming freely down to the ground. Her body felt numb, having trouble focusing in on her surroundings.

Her body was limp as no part made an effort to move, with the exception of her head as it moved to look at the 14th straight in the eyes. Even though a grin was on his face, his eyes told a different story. Instead of the crazy insanity that was surely to come from a Noah, deep within the golden pools she couldn't quite make out the emotion that was in his eyes. Was it the feeling of regret?

Discarding her from his sword he waited for the inevitable to happen as he watched her slowly and painfully begin to die. Lavi was hysterical as he looked at the 14th with pure hatred. Gripping his hammer tight in his hands, he rushed at the 14th, adrenaline fueling his anger.

"YOU BASTARD!!!!"

The 14th had been too distracted to block the move as he was sent to the opposite wall, Lavi quick to follow him. As he laid there, Lavi began pounding his hammer down on him, trying to beat him to a pulp. His emotions were getting the better of him as the 14th weakly tried to block by stopping the hammer with his right hand before it was knocked out of the way. He was unrelenting and merciless, for he thought Lenalee was now dead and it was all his fault, as he brought blow after blow down on him.

"You son of a bitch! I'm not stopping until I know for sure that you're not going to get back up. I don't care anymore if Allen is still inside you. All I care about now is killing you myself! You hear me!"

Blood was coating his face as the wound struggled to heal themselves before they were brought on again by Lavi's hammer. He was going in and out of consciousness as he could feel the sudden shift of controls as the real Allen began resisting and fighting as well. The tables were being turned as the 14th was slowly losing his control.

_Author's Note: Please Review_


	22. Tsunaida te ni kiss wo

Ch. 22: Tsunaida te ni kiss wo

_Allen hung from the cross that kept him suspended, blood still trickling down from the never ending wounds. Opening his eyes slowly, he stared at the crimson pool below his feet, his eyes unending pools of dull silver, his right eye now glazed over. As he listened to the consistent dripping of his blood and the never ending song of the 14__th__, he could make out the voices of all his friends._

_Suddenly the restraints that binded him to the cross became loose as the chains began rusting away for no apparent reason. With the links now weak, he used the last remaining strength to break free from his prison. Falling to the ground, he laid in his own pool of blood before slowly getting up onto his feet._

_He listened closely to the voices of his friends, now hearing Kanda and Krory, before he followed the direction to where the voices were coming from. Swaying this way and that, he walked forward through the never ending void of white that would make anyone double take to check to see if they were actually moving. Allen didn't rightfully care much if he wasn't moving of not. All that fueled him to keep going was the possible prospect of reaching to the spot of his friend's voices. _

_Walking for what seemed like hours, Allen finally came upon an unmarked door. Standing in front of it with his dull eyes falling upon it, he was very hesitant about opening the door. But he could here his friends on the other side as they fought his Noah self. Upon hearing Lenalee's voice, he reluctantly opened the door and walked into the unknown._

_Blinking a couple of times, he peered around at his surroundings. In the room was a grand piano, all the colors inverted. To the side was something like a viewing screen as he watched his friends fight for their lives. He was watching as Lavi brought forth his elemental serpent upon his Noah self. The 14__th__ had no trouble in slicing the creature in half as Lavi stood stunned. Then he noticed Lenalee._

_She came charging in at his Noah self, thinking that she could catch him off guard. But she was surely mistaken. This whole time, Allen had been watching with an impassive face, his eyes still the dull and unintelligent pools of grey until he saw his worst fears manifested into reality._

_As the sword of exorcism skewered her through the abdomen, the light that had once been gone from Allen's eyes returned as he looked back in horror at the one he loved fight to hold onto her life. He was snapped back into reality as looked at the screen with disbelief. This was the breaking point. This was when his sanity snapped completely._

_Clutching his head in between his hands, he let out a scream of sorrow before he rammed himself into the screen in an attempt to make himself known. Punching and kicking did no good for it didn't even leave a crack. Finding it hopeless, he leaned against the screen as he pounded hopelessly at the unbreaking glass before sliding down the glossy surface, staining the surface with his blood as he fell._

_Now on his knees, his bloody and almost broken knuckles hung limply at his sides as he stared at the ground as both tears and blood fell down his face. Then something inside him told him that he needed to play the piano. He brushed the thought that wasn't his own away until it told him that it would help Lenalee if he just played the 14__th__'s song backwards but with the same vocals._

_Deciding to go along with the voice, he slowly made his way to the piano before sitting down at the elongate stool. His hands hovered over the keys as they trembled violently, blood being shaken onto the keys. He was like that for a moment before he began playing the song in reverse._

*&*

Lavi continued to beat the crap out of the 14th until he faltered upon hearing the sound of a piano being played. The 14th slowly got to his feet as he clutched his head with his hands out of pain. Kanda and Krory stood beside Lavi, ready to restrain Lavi if he did anything stupid and irrational. Kanda continuously eyed the forgotten sword of exorcism as a plan came to mind if the 14th began attacking again. Then they all heard the voice of someone singing. It was Allen.

_Soushite bouya wa nemuri ni tsuita_

_Ikizuku hai no naka no honoo_

_Hitotsu futatsu to_

"Make it stop!"

The 14th was squirming around in pain as the control between him and Allen were going against each other. Lenalee laid almost unconscious as she recognized the voice and song. She was struggling to stay awake but the pain her wound was causing her was too much as she slowly succumbed to the pain and was out cold.

_Ukabu fukurami itoshii yokogao_

_Daichi ni taruru ikusen no_

_Yume yume_

*&*

_Lenalee walked down a corridor of endless white before she came across a door that was slightly ajared. Hearing the sound of a piano being played, she soundlessly entered the room. Once inside, she noticed the grand piano and its player with his back to her, having not heard her enter._

_Walking up to the piano, she listened to the beautiful yet mournful melody it was playing as the white haired exorcist moved his hands over the keys with expertise. She stared down at the keys as they were being dyed by his blood before she sat down beside him and just stared at the keys as he pressed them at certain intervals. _

_Looking at him, she smiled before she joined him in song, their voices fitting perfectly with each other. This finally made him notice her presence as a smile came upon his lips as he continued to sing, his fingering not faltering._

*&*

_Gin no hitomi no yuragu yoru ni_

_Umare ochita kagayaku omae_

_Ikuoku ni toshitsuki ga_

_Ikutsu inori wo tsuchi e kaeshitemo_

As they watched the 14th, all of them heard another voice that had joined in song. It was Lenalee. Looking back at the unmoving body of Lenalee's, Lavi watched in amazement as the life threatening wound began healing itself before his very eyes. And although she was still unconscious, the rise and fall of her chest was just enough proof to tell him that she was still alive.

_Watashi wa inori tsuzukeru _

_Douka konoko ni ai wo_

_Tsunaida te ni kisu wo_

Looking back at the 14th, he noticed that some of the features were changing back to the way Allen was. Both were wavering back and forth between the two as they struggled for dominance. The real Allen was quick to make his friends know just what he wanted them to do.

"Lavi…now…DO IT NOW!!"

Kanda pounced upon the sword of exorcism, grabbing hold of the left side of handle as he struggled to lift it up. Krory was quick to follow as he grabbed hold of the right side of the handle. They needed one more person to help them lift the heavy sword. And Lavi was holding back.

_Soushite bouya was nemuri ni tsuita_

_Ikizuku hai no naka no honoo_

_Hitotsu futatsu to_

"Lavi…please…I can't hold on to him much longer."

"Usagi…you heard the beansprout. So come on!"

Tears were forming in his eyes as closed them shut and ran forward. Grabbing hold of the middle part of the handle with both of his hands, all three of them shot forward and to the body of Noah Allen. He hadn't had time to think before he lurched forward as he was lifted off the ground.

"I guess my wish shall never be made into a reality."

_Ukabu fukurami itoshii yokogao_

_Daichi ni taruru ikusen no_

_Yume yume_

Lavi kept his eyes closed during the whole thing before he slowly opened them. As he looked up, he noticed all the Noah features begin to fade as they were being exorcised out of as the blade was plunged through his chest, immerging out onto the other side. Once they were gone, the real Allen looked at them with tears of joy as he was finally free of his torment at last

_Gin no hitomi no yuragu yoru ni_

_Umare ochita kagayaku omae_

_Ikuoku ni toshitsuki ga_

_Ikutsu inori wo tsuchi e kaeshitemo_

Seeing this had finally caused the tears to fall as best friends looked into each other's eyes. Allen struggled to lift his hand up to touch Lavi's in a sign of gratitude but he was already weak as it is and he could only make it partial way before his gloved hand slid down the side of the blade, blood smearing the surface. The three of them were reluctant to pull the sword out of him he wouldn't let them just leave him like that.

"Please…take the…sword out of me…I want to…see Lenalee…just one last time."

_Watashi wa inori tsuzukeru _

_Douka konoko ni ai wo_

_Tsunaida te ni kisu wo_

They carefully released the sword's hold from within Allen as Krory grabbed him under his right arm and Lavi grabbed hold of his armless left shoulder as they slowly dragged his tired and blood soaked form over to the still unconscious Lenalee. Keeping him in a sitting position, both exorcists backed away in order to give some space.

_Watashi wa inori tsuzukeru _

_Douka konoko ni ai wo_

_Tsunaida te ni kisu wo_

Lenalee slowly stirred awake, first noticing the once bleeding wound to her abdomen now completely healed. As she got up into a sitting position, she finally noticed Allen sitting in front of her with sad and tired eyes as he struggled to stay sitting. Noticing that all the Noah features that were once present were now gone, she wrapped her arms around his blood soaked form as she began crying into his shoulder. Feeling his body wince as pain shot through him from the sudden brought on of pain, she relaxed her hold on him as she looked down horrified at the blood that was still flowing from the wound to his chest.

His blood was dyeing her uniform as she looked down at the wound that would have, no should have killed him once it had been delivered. His breathing was shallow as he struggled to keep oxygen flowing to his lungs, one of which had been pierced by the sword. Falling forward, she caught him in her arms as she rested his head on her lap, tears falling into his partially bloody white hair.

"Lena…lee…I'm sorry for….all the pain…I've caused you…Please…forgive me."

"Please Allen…don't talk…you need to save your energy until we can take you to the Asian Branch."

"Huh…I don't know…if I…can hold on…until then."

"Don't talk like that. You're going to be alright, you'll see. So don't give up hope."

He struggled to get back up in his upright position but wasn't having any luck. Helping him up, she let him lean on her as she helped them both into a standing position. Leaning heavily on her, he turned his head to look at her in the eyes as love and sorrow mixed together in his eyes before he kissed her. Out of the couple of kisses they had shared with each other, this one by far had the most passion with it.

Both were kissing their fiercest with the other, tears streaming down his face as they kissed one last time. Separating for air, Allen smiled at her one small sad smile before his eyes rolled to the back of his head as he feel back down to the ground. She was quick to go do with him as she sat on her knees, watching Allen struggle for air as his breathing became even more shallow, uneven, and labored. His chest came up one more time before it came back down from his last breath. His heart had finally given up and stopped.

_Author's Note: Alright…all I'm going to say is…please review._


	23. Refuse to give up

_Author's Note: while writing this part, I was listening to the song: The Vision by: X-ray dog. It kind of help set the mood in this part so if you want to listen to it while reading, it will kind of help set the somber mood. Ofcourse, I'm not forcing you, it's just a suggestion if you're one of those people like me who have to listen to music while reading something. Hope you enjoy._

Ch. 23: Refuse to give up

Lenalee froze as she watched Allen take in one finally breath of air before his chest sank back down, no long rising. His face looked so calm, so at peace it frightened her. Just when Allen had returned to them, to her, he was once again gone. And this time it could be for good. Tears that had already been falling started sliding down her face even harder as she shook his shoulder, calling out his name in an attempt to bring him back to her. Nothing was working.

Her body was trembling as she tried to stiffle her sobs before she fell forward and began crying in his bloody chest. All her sorrow and despair poured out of her as the multitude of her crying increased. With a tightly closed fist, she began pounding in vain over his heart, as if that would bring him back to life. It did not.

Lavi by now had stepped beside Lenalee when Allen had callopsed back onto the ground and the sight of him taking in his last breath had brought him to knees. Silent tears were pouring down his as he stared down at his hands. His hands were shaking violently, Allen's blood coating his skin as it stained his fingers and gloves. The feeling of guilt was beginning to consume him as the memories of what he just did and Allen's death continued to replay inside his head.

If you wanted to get technical, he was the one who ultimately killed Allen in the end. He had the one had gone too far when he was trying to beat the crap out of the 14th. He had been the to hesitate then go forward as the starter for the three of them to actually move the blade that Allen could do on his own with one hand. He could of just decided not to help but that wasn't what Allen would've wanted. He had instead kept his promise and did what Allen had forced him to do. All should have been right in the world now that he had fulfilled his promise. So why was he feeling so guilty about it?

Miranda was hysterical as she sobbed uncontrollable, Krory almost rivaling the volume of her sadness with his own. Kanda stood to the side as he looked away, a single tear being shred from his eye, something that was still new to him. In all his years of fighting as an exorcist and watching the people he knew die around him, this had been the worst of it all. Sure, beansprout usually got on his nerves almost all the time but still. Who else was he going to have to taunt and make fun of of just be plain rude if he is gone? None the less, he quickly wiped it away, destroying any evidence that may point to him having actually shed a tear. He didn't need a dent in his reputation now, especially from the one person who still managed to aggravate him even in death.

"Damn beansprout..."

Lenalee continued to lay across his blood soakened chest before she lifted her head to look at his face once more, as if some signs of improvement had occured when she hadn't been paying attention. He still held the same look of being at peace just he did the last time she checked. Blood stained her cheeks and forehead, some of it even getting in her hair. Sorrow was all that could bee seen in her eyes as she bent over again and whispered something into his ear.

"Please....please don't leave me here all alone. Don't....don't go....please, I'm...begging you...please...I can't stand living without you...please come back...come back to me...I love you..."

As tears fell onto his stoic face, she hovered over his forehead for a moment before she kissed it tenderly. sitting on her knees once more, she moved Allen's still warm body onto her lap, holding his head within her arms as she held him protectively, burrowing her face into his hair. No one dared to to challenge Lenalee into leaving. They would give the heart broken exorcist all the time she needed to grieve. The Earl would have a lot of guts if he came here now with three exorcists ready to fight if need be.

Lavi moved over closer to Allen's body, his shadow falling upon his lifeless form. No, he would not except the fact that his best friend, his little brother, was gone. The boy that seemed to always have Lady Luck on his side, the one that was prophecized as the Destroyer of Time, the one who would ultimately save mankind, could not be dead. Allen never gave up easily, he always put up a good fight before going down in glory. He should've died doing what he was destined to do, not by something like this. He should've died fighting the Earl in one final showdown, the one shall stand and one shall fall battle.

He wasn't going to give up hope just yet. Allen's conscious was still there, somewhere in the recesses of his mind trapped and waiting to be brought back once more. Removing his boots and ripping the torn up pant legs all the way up to his knee, Lavi became desperate as he removed his scarf from around his neck and began tearing it into strips. Once they were sufficient enough, he began wrapping them around the burns that laced around Allen's legs. Kanda was the first to stare at him quizzically as Lavi continued unstopping with poorly bandaging the dead exorcist's wounds.

"Lavi, what are you doing?"

"I'm making sure Allen doesn't have to endure so much pain when he wakes up."

Kanda eyed him nervously as Lavi answered, his voice cracking every now and then, his usual happy and annoying self gone.

"I hate to break it to you Lavi but...beansprout is dead. There's no reversing that unless you want to sell your soul to the Earl. So I see no point in you trying to bandage someone who isn't coming back---"

Immediately Lavi stopped everything he was doing and launched himself at Kanda, knocking him to the ground. As he pinned him to the ground, Lavi grabbed hold of the scruff of Kanda's jacket as he lifted him slightly off the ground in order to make himself known.

"Shut up! Allen is going to come back to us, you'll see. He always does. And I'm going to make sure that when he does, he at least won't have to bleed to death!"

This had happened too fast for Kanda to react. His eyes were wide with surprise as he stared up at the determined Lavi who, either knew something they didn't or had gone completely to the deep end. He'd liked to think that Lavi had gone just plain crazy but he did have a point. Everytime someone thought he was a goner and would never come back alive, he had always proved them wrong. Besides, if he was wrong, he wasn't about to stop someone who was acting pretty crazy from doing his mindless busy work in order to reassure himself.

Lavi shoved Kanda back down to the ground hard as he went back to crudely bandaging up Allen. No one dared to even speak anymore as they all watched Lavi in silence.

*&*

_A red and dark purple sky hung overhead, a dead tree accompaning the dark scenery. Shadows stretched out across the baren land, clouds of storm overcasting in the sky. The sun stayed position midway in the sky, not quite a sunrise but not quite a sunset either._

_An unmoving body laid sprawled across the dead grass, his hair being tossed around by the steady breeze. The uniform he wore shifted around from the breeze as well, following the same rhythm that his hair was following. The young man laid there unmoving, not even a faint rise and fall of his chest to signify that he was even still alive. _

_The cause of death was unknown for no visible indication could be seen anywhere on his body. He laid on the ground unscathed, his face emotionless. Just a little ways away stood a grave stone in the form of a cross, only a name scrawled across the stony surface. Mana Walker._

_A figure suddenly appeared out of no where, dressed in a fairly nice suit, holding a boutique of white roses as he stood in front of the grave stone._

_"I'm sorry for not being there at your funeral those many years ago."_

_The figure then bent down and placed the bushel of flowers in front of the grave stone, staring at the cross for a moment before getting back into a standing position. He kept his hands in his pockets as he listened to the wind blow arond him. As it tossed his hair around, the wind created a strong enough gust to dislodge the petals off of one of the white roses, sending them spiraling through the wind. The figure watched as they danced across the sky, greatly contrasting the reds, oranges, and purples, before landing gently across the body of the still unmoving young man._

_The figure shifted his body around to face the young man. The wind picked up again as it tousled his hair into a further disarray. Listening to the wind as it spoke to him, the figure closed his eyes in understanding as the wind began to die down. A small lopsided smile came across his lips as he slowly reopened his eyes, walking over to the lifeless form of the young man._

_Bending down to his knees to get to a closer level, he stared at the white petals that layed scattered across his body, matching the equally as white hair on the young man's head. Outstretching a hand, it hovered over the forehead of the young man for a moment before it slowly lowered down until it was pressed gently against the surface. With the contact between the two, a transfer of energy seemed to be flowing from the stranger and into the young man._

_"Just because my dream didn't come true, doesn't mean yours has to too. Besides, I know you'll be able to bring peace and salvation to those who have been tainted and corrupted by the Earl. Thank you for finally releasing all my bottled up anger and desire for revenge. Now it's your job to finish what I've started. You must return to the world of the living so that your destiny shall be accomplished. I know that it will be a rocky start because of all the pain I have place upon you but don't stop moving forward. Don't stop. Keep walking. Goodbye... and goodluck...Allen Walker."_

_And so, as his last words were being said, the 14th slowly faded away, after giving his life so that Allen could live his. The 14th would now fully be at true peace alongside his brother._

_Author's Note: Alright...um...this story is almost at an end but there will be a sequel to this story, so don't you worry. I'll probably do a couple of more chapters until I decide on working on the sequel. So, NO I didn't end this story with the death of Allen. I could never truely kill Allen off. Maybe get him pretty messed up but never make it to where it's 'he's dead, now get over it'. No, I don't like that kind of stuff. And to conclude this little author's note before I get started on working on the next chapter, Please Review. I thought I would get a boat load of reviews going crazy about Allen being dead but I guess I was wrong. No big deal I guess. _


	24. Road to recovery

Ch. 24: Road to recovery

Lavi continued his poor attempts at trying to dress some of Allen's wounds, managing only to be able to wrap his legs, his arms, and was now working on the chest wound. He had ran out of material to use to wrap up the wound tight, having used up his scarf and even his headband to wrap the other wounds. So instead, he improvized. Taking of the jacket that was on his back, he gently pried his body out of Lenalee's hands as he draped it over his shoulders. Zipping it up, he grabbed both of the armless sleeves and wrapped them tight behind him, the idea that came to mind when he realized that the wound needed some pressure applied to it.

He gently placed him back into her arms, wrapping her arms around his chest. As her arms settled against his chest, she suddenly felt something that caught her attention. Moving her hand around, she started looking for the source of the movement, finally coming to rest over his heart. She couldn't believe what she was feeling. Allen's heart was beating albeit faintly but that didn't matter at the moment. All that mattered now was that he was alive. But was it her imagaination?

Laying him back down onto his back, she bent her head forward, pressing an ear over his heart.

"What is it Lenalee?"

She didn't reply, just raising up her index finger to signal that she needed a moment of silence for a minute. Closing her eyes, she tried consintatring on focusing in on what she thought was just her imagination. Through the somewhat thick material of Lavi's jacket, she could just barely make out the faint beating of his heart.

She lifted her head off from his chest and looked at the others hastily, too speechless to tell them her discovery. Grabbing hold of one of Lavi's hands, she pulled him closer towards him, bringing his hand down over Allen's heart. As Lavi began moving his hand away, already satisfied with the fact that he didn't need reminding that Allen was dead, only to stop when Lenalee laid her hands on top of his, preventing them from moving away. He reluctantly allowed his hand to be pressed there until he jolted up in surprise, his eyes widening in shock. He could feel the very faint beating of Allen's heart as it attempted to pump blood through his body.

Lavi looked between Allen and then Lenalee, astonishment sketched across his features. No words could describe the emotions that were running between the two exorcists as tears of joy streamed down their face. In his daze of happiness, he almost forgot the state Allen was still in as he still wasn't out of the woods yet. He still walked between the fine line of life and death.

He then scrambled even closer to his body as he scooped him into his arms, trying to position him to where there would be less movement involved. Getting to his legs, the others excluding Lenalee eyed him strangely, the rest of them still not knowing that Allen was alive. But Lavi thought it be best to explain later as he dashed out of the Noah base, trying to be delicate with his movements as he ran as fast as he could. As Lenalee got ready to follow him, she felt a strong hand wrap around her arm.

Turning back, she was greeted with the stern and confused look of Kanda as his eyes asked her what the hell was going on. All she could do was smile at him before muttering something along the lines that Allen was alive. Astonishment moved across his face as she pulled away to follow Lavi. The others having heard her as well, they were quick to follow Lavi and Lenalee, leaving behind Kanda who by now, had an amused look on his face. Shaking his head side to side with an amused grin on his face, eyes closed, he let himself ponder upon this for a moment.

"...well I'll be damned...the kid actually pull through..."

Walking over to the forgotten sword of exorcism, Kanda looked down upon it for a moment before taking in a deep breath as he bent down to grab the sword. Grabbing hol of the handle with both of his hands, he lifted it up as high as could, which wasn't much seeing as how he was still injuried and wasn't at his full strength, making the blade feel ten times heavier. However beansprout could carrying such a bulky sword around, let alone with one arm, was something he never thought to ask himself until now.

Well he had to quit his complaining and bring the sword with them. Who else was going to drag around the huge sword back to the Asian Branch? Well, seeing as how everyone had foolishly left him with the thing, it might as well be him. Whenever cooled down, beansprout better not take him for granted. After all, he couldn't say he didn't help.

*&*

They took the boat that Kanda, Krory, and Miranda had used to get there, glad that they still had some form of transportation fast enough to bring them to the Asian Branch. They immediatly began to set sail once Kanda had made it aboard, the finders looking at the blood soakened Allen in apprehension as he still laid in Lavi's arms. Blood had by now begun to soak through the jacket that had been wrapped around him. He was still losing a lot of blood. That wasn't good.

It took them a couple of hours to even see the shore line where the Asian Branch was located nearby. Lenalee was constantly breathing air into Allen as he still struggled to get even the simplest breath of air on his own. Thank goodness he was still unconscious for she didn't think she would be able to listen his cries of pains throughout the what seemed like slow going journey. Getting closer to the shore, Lenalee couldn't stand the slow moving pace any longer.

Taking Allen into her arms, she struggled for a moment to get him situated, afraid she might drop him if she held him in an awkward angle. He was suprising light, which didn't register as good in her book right now. Lavi was against the plan she had in mind, afraid she might not be able to substain Allen's weight for too long but he wasn't going to stop her. Checking one more time that he was safe and secure in her arms, she then began running across the deck, building up momentum.

Making it to the hand rails that wrapped around the entire ship, she jumped onto the railing before propelling herself from that as well. Activating her innocence, she allowed her emotions to fuel her innocence as she flew over to the large door that would lead them underground to the Asian Branch. She was unstopping as she tried making her way to the underground base in the dark. She couldn't stop. Not with Allen's life hanging from the balance.

Landing on the ground gracefully, she began running through the dense forest that she hoped would lead her to her chosen destination. She was getting very tired and exhausted bt she couldn't worry about herself. Allen had to come first. While looking down at Allen, she almost ran into a tree, looking up just in time to narrowly miss it. After minutes of continous running, she could finally see the gate way that led to the Asian Branch Black Order.

Making it to the huge gate, she stood there for a moment, contemplating what her next move should be. Looking back down at Allen as he rested in her arms, panic began filling her when she could hear him gasping for breath. Breathing into him once more, she decided now wasn't the time to be rational. Now was the time to act. And now her plan was to kick as hard as she could against the gate, knocking it down if she had to in order to get their attention.

Stepping back, she ran forward, delivering a series of kicks to the gate, causing cracks to run along the fortified concrete slab of stone. With each delivered kick, she would steadily lose her strength as the action was wearing her out even further. Her legs now trembling and struggling to substain the weight of both her and Allen up, almost callopsed from underneath her if it weren't for her determination that was keeping her going. Slowly, the door opened and out came Bak Chan, leader of the Black Order Asian Branch.

He had monitoring the situation from inside and when he noticed it was Lenalee, he was quick to come. But he wasn't expecting the scene that laid in front of him. Walking up to her, held her by her shoulders, trying to keep her standing.

"Lenalee, what are you doing here?"

When he touched her shoulders, that was when he could feel the blood that he had failed to notice that also covered her face in the dark. Quickly removing his hands, he stared down at them, only to look up when he heard a sudden gasping noise, causing him to jump in surprise. Realizing that it wasn't Lenalee, he finally noticed the white haired exorcist that laid in her arms.

"Bak, you have to help Allen. The Black Order Headquarters is too far away to take him there, not without the ark but he doesn't have control over it at the moment. Please...I need your help....he's dying."

Bak didn't take a second to hesitate as he took Allen out of her arms and into his as he ran back down into his base and to the medical center with Lenalee closely following him. They must've ran miles unstopping in the dimmly lited underground base before they came across the medical center. Reaching it, they were quickly created by some doctors and nurses who came rushing in on the scene upon hearing Bak's shouts for the staff.

They quickly carried him to one of the more private rooms, some doctors already preping the area for surgery. Lenalee motioned to follow them but Bak got in the way as he stood in front of her, preventing her from going any further.

"I'm sorry Lenalee but you can't go any further at this point. He's going into to surgery as we speak so that my doctors may help and try to mend any internal bleeding inside. Now, tell me what happened."

Lenalee looked back at him and the door they had carried Allen away in before she began reciting the events when this all began.

*&*

After she had been cleaned up and been given a dress to wear in place of her no longer in perfect condition uniform, the others had made it as well. The science department were quick to take Allen's sword from Kanda, ready to restore it back to it's once flawless colors. Krory, Lavi, and Lenalee had rooms in the medical center, all them having substanded some minor cuts here and there along with bruises.

Kanda stayed for a couple of hours before leaving by taking the ship that had brought them there. He didn't want to stay long and someone needed to report back to the Order about what had happened. Miranda sat in a chair next to Lenalee's bed, waiting patiently for the Science department here to fix her cracked weapon. But by then she had already fallen asleep in her chair as exhaustion quickly sunk in upon sitting down.

As the others slept, Lenalee laid awake, wanting to know the condition Allen was in. The doctors that had taken Allen away hadn't made their appearance at least once to report about his condition, leading her to believe that he may still be under the operating table. Quietly getting out of bed and out of the room, she walked down the silent hallway that would lead to Allen's room.

Upon reaching it, Bak was exiting the room, startled when he noticed Lenalee when he was turning around.

"How is he?"

"Well I can tell you one thing. I'm amazed he's actually still alive after hearing what they found. Some of his organs were beginning to fail and shut down once you brought him here, but we've managed to repair some of the damaged there and letting the rest heal on his own. Almost all his ribs were either cracked or broken, burns cover his legs, and damage was substained to his right eye. But dued to the severiety of his injuries, he's fallen into a coma. We don't know how long it will take before he wakes up."

"Can I see him?"

"Ofcourse."

Bak reopened the door, stepping to the side to let Lenalee in. As she walked inside, she noticed all the machines that surrounded his bed, each one connected to him in some way, shape, or form. Bandages laced around his chest, having been recently replaced in order to keep them clean. A blanket was draped across his body, reaching up halfway to his chest, his arm laying above the surface. Tubes and cords seemed to be everywhere as some were place on his chest to monitor his heart, tubes sticking into his right arm and down his throat and into his nose.

She took a moment to look at all the equipment before pulling a chair right beside his bedside. Grabbing his right hand in her own, she stared back down at Allen as she watched the steady rise and fall of his chest. Bak stood by the door for a moment before giving them some time alone by leaving once again. How long was it going to take until Allen was completely healed? How long would he stay in tha coma? Days? Weeks? Months? However long it took, she would not leave his bed side for no more than half a day. She wanted to stay with him as much as possible. And when he does wake up, she'll be there to welcome him back. He was on the long road to recovery.

_Author's Note: Alright, I think I'm going to make this the last chapter to this story. I might do an epilogue to it but I haven't decided on that yet. I'll begin working on the sequel soon and hopefully will have it sometime this week. Thank you to all my reviewers who have really enjoyed this story and have followed it to the end. Hope you'll enjoy the next one just as much._

_-Howlingwolf94_


	25. Epilogue

Epilogue

The Earl walked down the quiet halls, his gait not faltering as continued walking. He was in a happy mood for whatever reason. Making it to the dining room, he was greeted by the stares of the remaining Noah follow his every move as he made his way to his seat at the head of the table.

Taking his seat, he clasped his hands together as he looked at each of the Noahs individual. He stared into each of their eyes, a chuckle slowly coming over him, the thought of what he was going to them echoed in his head. Tyki looked at him apprehensively, nervous with the news that he had to share with the Earl.

"Um...Lord Millineium..."

"Yes Tyki-pon?"

"You might not like what I have to say but, Walker isn't dead."

"I know."

"You do?"

"Yes, but we'll change that later. But for right now, I have important news to share with you all today.

All of them held their breath, each one of them eager to here what the Earl had to say.

"I've figured out where the heart is."

"Who is it?!?"

All the Noahs leaned forward as they waited impatiently for the Earl to tell them who it was. But they weren't expecting the answer he was about to give them.

"Not who, them. The heart has been recently discovered to have been split into two parts. And it resides within the two of them."

As he was saying this, he pulled out two pictures the size of cards as he allowed them to hover over his hand before turning around to show the audiance.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, we've got work to do."

_Author's Note: I hope you know by now who the two are. Or at least make some guesses. Sequel will be posted by the end of Friday at the lastest._


	26. Author's Note

**Author's Note**

Hello to all my faithful and loyal fans, I'm please to inform you that I have decided that, in and if next couple of weeks permitted, I will begin revising and fixing all plot holes within both _Doubt and Trust_ and _Love's Sorrowful Symphony_. Both will be titled _Re: Doubt and Trust_ and _Re: Love's Sorrowful Symphony_ and both will be elaborated on as best and as much as I can.

I was originally just going to fix the spelling and grammar errors, but then I realized that I really wanted sit down and actually, seriously revise it. That's why there is a distinct possibility that I'll be adding much detailed scenes and interactions. And maybe, if I get down to, even throwing in a new chapter every now and again to fix some of my forgotten plot holes within both stories.

I hope this bides well with everyone and that you're for this extreme clean up. I know I still have other projects at the moment, but I would really like to this. My conscious will never rest until I have down this. And it will be a nice change in pace when it comes to the repetitive routine of updating the same three stories.

Please look out for the distant bay of this howling wolf.

Howlingwolf94


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